Hamster Boy

Just Chugging Along

2011-04-15T12:44:00.002-07:00

It's been some time since my last update and I find I forget that I even have a blog. With ongoing problems with my back and not being able to sit for long, it created a problem indeed when it came to trying to produce a blog post.

However, the pain is subsiding and I am most grateful!

Basically the update is this: Hayden's feet are still determined to to turn back in and he will require surgery. We are planning to delay it until the Fall and attempt to do as much as possible to possibly avoid it. This involves physio, home exercise and returning to the boots and bar. I'm sad about this but he seems to accept it at this point. However, he forgets what it is like to sleep in the contraption, so we shall see!

Other than that, things are pretty good. We are all finally over this weird respiratory virus we got and it is desperately trying to be Spring in Vancouver!

Lewy Body Dementia Awareness Week

2010-10-10T06:00:00.003-07:00

(click to make bigger)

This is an emotional post for me to write. How do I talk about this? How do I detach myself long enough to educate people about this devastating disease that is now insinuating it itself into my life and even more so, my parents' lives?

For most people who have known my dad for a long time, they will identify with him as being gregarious, active, vital and genuine and I hope this is how they will always think of him.

About four and a half years ago, my mom started noticing that my dad was having some memory issues. She wasn't the only one. People at his job had noticed too so it needed to be checked out. Not too long after that, he began to develop some movement difficulties. My Dad was referred to a neurologist and was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease.

For the next while his condition was treated as Parkinson's with medicine for movement disorders and he also took a medicine to slow the memory problems. It was suggested that he retire from his job as he worked around high voltages as an electrician for the local electric company.

In early Spring , my mother started noticing some major changes in Dad. This was during a major trip they'd taken to Australia earlier in the year. He was more often confused, his movement had slowed even more and he was at times "seeing things" that were either not there or his brain was mis-identifying objects. The symptoms worsened once they were home.

Mom was dissatisfied with the doctor that was tending to Dad's "Parkinson's". His bedside manner was undesirable and he was ONLY treating the movement disorder. She came into contact with the Senior Mental Health chapter near her and they arranged for an in home evaluation and a following meeting with the psychiatrist.

It was determined that Dad has Dementia with Lewy Bodies. He is 69 years old.

Most people hear the word "dementia" and automatically think of Alzheimer's, but this particular dementia differs from Alzheimer's in that it includes hallucinations and due to the movement disorder, falls. It differs because the patient can phase in and out of certain symptoms. That is to say, one day the patient may forget how to do something and the next day they may not. It also brings with it a bouquet of other issues, such as REM sleep disorder, excessive daytime sleepiness and restless leg syndrome. All of these things can have occurred before the actual diagnosis.

Lewy Body Dementia usually has a rapid progression and there is no cure for it. Commonly misdiagnosed as Parkinson's Disease, it used to be considered rare. It no longer is as it may potentially be the second most common subtype of dementia after Alzheimer's.

Because DLB has no cure, it gradually renders people incapable of tending to their own needs. Caregiving is thus very important and must be carefully managed over the course of the disease. Caring for people with DLB involves adapting the home environment, schedule, activities, and communications to accommodate declining cognitive skills and parkinsonian symptoms.

My goal at this time is to support my parents as much as I possibly can, both physically and emotionally and to educate people about this disease. Hug someone you love today because you never know what tomorrow may bring.

The Lewy Body Dementia Association has a full, comprehensive website devoted to this disease and have launched their awareness week today, running until October 16th.

Update on Hayden

2010-10-06T16:54:00.005-07:00

I took Hayden to a follow up appointment on Monday with his orthopaedic surgeon and it has been determined that his feet are relapsing and he will need to go into casts again.

I can't say I am all that surprised because I had my suspicions way back in January when I noticed he was going up onto the toes of his left foot when he ran. At that time I took him in and when Dr. Pirani got him to run, he wouldn't do it! Of course. It was, however, decided then that he has "tibial torsion" in his left leg, which causes the foot to look turned in. The thing that DID surprise me was that his right foot is also relapsing. Didn't see that one coming.

Basically it just gradually got worse and I couldn't put off a visit to the ortho any longer. So sometime in November (hopefully) he will begin a six week course of casting, with them being changed every two weeks.

So what does this mean aside from the back trauma this is going to cause me? Well, his school will have to be notified so they can arrange for help for him. He will likely be in a wheelchair, so I'm not sure how the school will handle it as the school is not even remotely wheelchair accessible - it is 100 years old, after all! But we'll figure it out I suppose. There's a good chance Hayden will sort out how to walk in the casts because lots of kids have done so. But that will take a while for him, I'm guessing.

After the casting, it will be decided whether he needs to go into the boots and bar again (oh boy, don't even get me started on this one) or if he will require a tendon transfer surgery, which will require more casts.

I'll post another update once I have more information!

Book Review: The Crimson Rooms by Katharine McMahon

2010-01-31T10:18:00.009-08:00

The Crimson Rooms by Katharine McMahon

A woman arrives from Canada on the doorstep of a family of grieving English women with more than a little surprise. The family is expected to accept what is before them and furthermore, support and welcome the situation.

In post World War I London where women are still struggling to make their mark in a male dominated world, Evelyn Gifford is fighting to become a lawyer. Having been given a slight opportunity to advance by the only law firm who will accept her, she soon finds herself embroiled in two important cases, one a sensational murder trial.

Along the way, while trying to understand the arrival of Meredith, who shares a shocking secret with her, she works to save one client and gain the trust of another; finds herself in a surprise love affair; and turns out to be a better sleuth than her male counterparts.

This story had me hooked right away. Not only do I absolutely love historical novels, but the added element of Canada (my home and native land) delighted me to no end. The story follows so many little rabbit trails and as you get to know Evelyn better, you realize she has a stronger constitution than she gives herself credit for, especially when learning how one can make the ultimate sacrifice for love.

In addition, you get a real feel for what women fought so hard for in the way of rights and equality; something that sadly still happens today. These women were the true trailblazers and paved the way for womankind worldwide.

I can't recommend this book enough and while I am sorry to say that this is the first book I have read by Katharine McMahon, it is a fault I intend to rectify immediately! (Good heavens, I've adopted the language of the book already!)

I very much appreciated the opportunity to read this novel and thank MotherTalk for giving me the chance to do so. Look for the the release on February 8, 2010. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did! The following online book retailers will be carrying it:

Amazon
Barnes and Noble
Borders
Indie Bound

**I wrote this review while participating in a blog campaign by MotherTalk on behalf of G.P. Putnam's Sons / Riverhead and received a copy of the book to facilitate my candid review. Mom Central sent me a gift card to thank me for taking the time to participate.**

Scala Bio-Fir Anti-Cellulite Shaper Wear

2009-11-03T16:21:00.011-08:00

Okay Ladies, pull up a chair, grab a drink and listen closely. I am going to tell you about a product that I discovered recently and it's A-MAZING.

First off, I have no affiliation with this product or the company who sells it - I am merely a believer (can I get an AMEN?) This product is Scala Bio-Fir Slimming/Shaper Wear and it reduces cellulite. Did you hear that? REDUCES CELLULITE. Not only does it make you look terrific while you are wearing it, but it does a job for you at the same time!

I had passed by this little gem of a store in my neighbourhood many times and had noticed the sandwich board outside advertising this great product. I have purchased over the years a number of slimming garments only to be disappointed by them. They're too tight in the leg, or they roll funny or they are too hot. Everything Scala is not.

Here's how it works. Hot off the knitting machines in Brazil, the fabric these garments are made with contains tiny crystals (called Active Bio Crystals or Far Infrared Rays) that continuously massages your skin. The massaging action causes friction, stimulating blood flow at the skin level. The increased blood flow stimulates the body's lymphatic system which then melts away the subcutaneous fat layer and the toxins responsible for cellulite and the liquified fat is then disposed of by either the kidneys or liver. I am sure drinking extra water during this time would only help to flush away the waste faster.

Sandra Kesselman, who owns Noir Fashions - the sole distributor for Scala in Canada - waited for three months to get a Medical Device Establishment License from Health Canada to sell the shaper wear. To me, their approval was an indicator that it worked, but I had to try it for myself.

Approximately 6 weeks ago I purchased both the High Waisted Knee Length Slimming Panty (above) and the Slimming Legging. I began wearing the knee length one daily. Scala promises results in 30 days but I am here to tell you that I saw changes in the cellulite on my thighs in about two weeks! After one month of wear there is a definite difference. The dimpling and lumpiness is much reduced, in fact almost completely gone! In addition to that, the garment is extremely comfortable, breathable and there is no tightness or rolling in the leg. All versions have the rubberized waist band to prevent slippage and rolling.

I had given myself the goal of one year to exercise and get toned again and the plan was to get liposuction for the cellulite if my efforts hadn't helped in that regard. Scala has saved me the trouble and expense.

Considering what these garments do, you would expect to pay a premium for them but they cost about the same as regular girdles and shaper wear at department stores, with the prices running between $50-65 depending on the garment. To care for these garments, machine wash them but hang them to dry to preserve the lycra content. The crystals are unaffected by regular washing.

Currently at Noir Fashions, Sandra is carrying 6 products in this line, one of them for men.

I had to opportunity to ask Sandra a couple of questions about her involvement with Scala.

Heather:
How did you come to learn of the Scala Bio Promise Line?

Sandra:
I’ve being representing SCALA in Canada for almost 5 years now. I import and distribute the brand collection all over the country. We started with the outerwear and the traditional shapewear lines. In February 2009, they launched this new amazing line. It took us about 3 months to get the Medical Device Establishment License from Health Canada to distribute the product in the country.

Heather:
What benefits have you noticed from using these garments?

Sandra:
I'm wearing mainly the black legging as my uniform since I delivered my baby girl 4 month ago, and I can really testify that the product is amazing on improving circulation. I’ve got bad varicose veins from the pregnancy and they were very painful, after using the product for 2/3 weeks, I got much better, no pain and the appearance of the veins are much lighter. My legs were also very swollen from the pregnancy, I retained lots of liquid, I took my measurements and I lost one inch on my calf muscle area and 2 inches on my thighs after a month of wearing the product.

Heather:
What future products can we expect in this line?

Sandra:
I’m about to receive the posture bra and some pantyhose made with the same material.

Right now there is limited information on the internet about these awesome cellulite-busting undergarments and I just had to share my success and happiness with what they have done for me!

These fine products, along with many more fashionable Scala items can be purchased at:

Noir Fashion
3950 Main Street
Vancouver, BC
Phone: 604-628-9561
Fax: 778-737-1591

To contact Sandra either call her at the above number or email her at sandra@noirfashion.ca. She is very friendly and willing to answer any and all of your questions!

Go on, GIVE THEM A TRY!

Knit the Season, a Review

2009-11-01T07:46:00.005-08:00

It's appropriate that the third installation in this series by Kate Jacobs would come to me now, when the weather is turning cold and holidays abound.

In August of 2008 I read the first novel, The Friday Night Knitting Club. Besides the fact that I am a knitting maniac, the characters just enraptured me and the ending left me quite bereft, to be honest.

That following Autumn, I had the privilege of reading and reviewing Knit Two, the second novel. Picking up the story five years later, Kate Jacobs wove a wonderful story of a group of characters, all attempting to "let go" in some way. My previous review is here. I also had the chance to see Kate Jacobs in person in January of this year at an event at a local knitting store, Urban Yarns, which was most thrilling to me!

And then we get to Knit the Season. Fast forwarding another few years, there are many exciting events and opportunities afoot and this time each character is now struggling with togetherness, with both family and friends. As with the previous two books, I did not want the story to end as these women have become friends to me.

I will venture to say that I found this book more painful to read than the last two. And by painful, I mean emotionally. Georgia Walker, a character who was lost to us in book one, was remembered in small vignettes in a variety of voices, some new to us. I found it very hard to read these flashbacks and not cry. In The Friday Night Knitting Club, Georgia was known to us, but we only got necessary snippets of her past. Kate Jacobs went one step further with Knit the Season and opened up some of the finer intimacies of Georgia's life. It was entirely fitting that she should still be the centrepiece of the story.

Put this book on your list for the upcoming holidays, either for yourself or friends and family. I'd love to think that this series could go on, but we shall see. Kate Jacobs has created some other great characters in her other novel, Comfort Food. Maybe we'll see what's happened to them next!

Sunday Scribblings #180

2009-09-12T19:24:00.006-07:00

The thing with the tattoo was that it never stayed in the same place. Always roaming around on her body, surprising her with new locations and sometimes, new shapes. Often people would look at her in surprise and say "I didn't know you had a tattoo!" and she would have to try and pretend it wasn't real because she knew in a day or two it would be somewhere else, probably somewhere hidden, and explaining was just too hard.

One day something new happened. She arose at her usual hour and wandered to the bathroom to freshen up. Today the tattoo was plainly in sight on her left forearm and was in the form of a very lovely butterfly. As she inspected it lightly she felt a tingling in her arm around the outside of the tattoo. The tingling became more intense and warm as the skin began to pucker and then rise slightly as an actual butterfly took shape from her arm. The wings were so delicate and translucent in glorious colours. She searched her brain for what genus it might be but was at a loss. After some time, the tingling began to subside as the butterfly completely emerged from her arm, leaving only a faint imprint where it once was. It flapped its wings once and then lifted from her and headed for the open bathroom window. Something in her wanted to cry "don't go!" and she almost reached out her hand to it, but she thought better of it because she had noticed something new about herself.

She felt free.

******************************
Just a little short story for Sunday Scribblings. The theme was "Tattoo". I guess you can figure out that the tattoo wasn't a tattoo at all. I wonder who can guess what it really was?

Daniel X - Watch the Skies

2009-08-12T19:44:00.005-07:00

I have had the privilege of reading the second Daniel X (Watch the Skies) book in a new series by James Patterson. I read and reviewed the first book almost exactly one year ago and I can honestly say the sequel does not disappoint.

If you are looking for a lively, fun, action-packed, gore-filled series for your 8 to 10 year old son to read, then get these books. I promise he won't put them down. I'm a 41 year old Mom and I was mesmerized by this young adult novel!

Daniel is a 15 year old Alien Hunter and boy, is he ever good at what he does! With the help of a team of conjured experts, he is able to track down, outwit and overpower the featured alien in each book. I can hardly wait to read the next one!

In this particular edition, Daniel goes up against his toughest alien yet and is almost defeated many times in some nail-biting scenes. It makes me worried for what's to come!

As with Mr. Patterson's Maximum Ride series, there is no urgent need to read the first novel as he artfully catches you up without repeating too much from the previous novel. This is one thing I appreciate very much about his writing.

The chapters are very short, so as to keep the attention of even the most disinterested reader and what an accomplishment for a non reader to say they've read a 90 chapter book! There's a definite "squick" factor when it comes to the battle scenes as Mr. Patterson very vividly describes them which had me wishing my imagination wasn't so active at times, tee hee!

If you are looking for an interesting and exciting read for your child, not just your son, then this is the series to get them started on. There are some words which may be difficult for earlier readers, so a parent might want to follow along, but other than that, hang on to your hats because it's one heckuva ride!

So. Excited.

2009-07-16T07:55:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow I get to meet this lady. I am bursting at the seams with excitement! There will be more about this after the weekend. I promise.

The Graduate

2009-06-11T06:42:00.011-07:00

I didn't expect to get so emotional at Hannah's high school graduation ceremony last night, but when they presented the Class of 2009, my eyes welled up and my face got all wobbly as I tried to contain myself. It really hit me. This beautiful creature that I seemingly just birthed yesterday is now on the cusp of adulthood. Striding across the stage in her four inch heels, towering above most of her classmates, I felt a strange mixture of emotions; sadness, pride, appreciation that I have had the privilege of getting her this far (not without the help of others) and honour in knowing her at all.

Hannah and I had a rough start to her life. I was not much older than she is now when I gave birth to her. Without beleaguering the point, her biological donor and I split up when I was 8 months pregnant. It was one of the most stressful times in my life and I do believe she saved my life. At night, when my emotions would get the better of me, she'd move around in my belly as though to say "it's okay mom, I'm here" and then she'd grow very still, calm. She was, is and always will be the first true love of my life. This is not the same love you feel for your own parents, or your siblings or your spouse. It goes so much deeper because she is a part of me. She shares half the same chromosomes as me (well, so does my twin but that's different!) Without the unconditional support of my parents and siblings, I would not have made it through the first year of Hannah's life on my own. I am forever grateful to them. She shares very special bonds with her grandparents and her aunts and uncles.

As Hannah began to change and grow, I vowed to myself that she would be an independent person and be self-reliant. She has more than exceeded my expectations. She became a sweet personality, eager to please and fun to be around. She shares my quirky sense of humour and sometimes only a phrase ("Razzle Dazzle") will set us to giggles. I can recall her being about two or three and holding a flashlight under her chin, saying "I'm the lepterchaun" in her most menacing voice. That memory will always make me smile!

I could not have asked for a better child to raise for the first time. Everyone she touches tells me how much they love her and how kind and sweet she is. People loved having her for sleepovers because she was well-behaved and respectful. She is playful, energetic and fun. She has a compassionate heart and a strong mind. She has always acted much older than her age and while I think that may be because of her early circumstances, it is not a bad trait to have.

She will be attending University on the other side of the country come September. I don't know how I will endure her being that far away, not able to rush to her side for any perceived crisis or thing, or just to hang out. My heart scrinches up whenever I think about it. I think I'll wait until that time before I get too freaked out.

For now, brimming with pride, I'll just sit back and admire the woman she is becoming and envision what the future holds for her.

Hannah, I love you my baby, my beautiful girl. I'll always be here for you.

Makin' Changes

2009-06-03T06:49:00.003-07:00

For a good six weeks at least, probably since I last made a post here, I've been doing my very best to exercise at least five times a week. It all started when quite inadvertently I discovered I had some residual diastasis in my abdomen (the separation of muscles that occurs during pregnancy). I had been cuddling in bed with Hayden and went to sit up. As I did so, I had put my hand on my stomach and was horrified when my fingers sank into my middle. Shudder.

After some research, it became evident to me why any exercise I had done over the last few years had really had no impact whatsoever on my midriff. Any abdominal exercise I had done had only served to maintain the diastasis. Yuck.

I found a fabulous book, Lose Your Mummy Tummy, by Julie Tupler. I highly recommend this book for anyone who is pregnant, post-partum or has a diastasis. Julie's exercises are easy to do and all it takes it a little stick-to-itiveness to get back on track. Of course, be sure to consult your doctor ahead of time.

While it took a little less than the six weeks Julie recommends to repair it (mine was pretty minor as it turns out), I kept at it and have just now begun to reintegrate abdominal exercises into my workout routine. The nicest thing about this is that it got the ball rolling and I am now in a place where I enjoy my workout and look forward to it. In fact, I rarely am able to exercise on the weekend and I find I quite miss it.

I started with just fat burning on the elliptical machine. I had decided that since music did nothing to motivate me to exercise that I would try something different. I carted out my Buffy Season Seven and watched those on the portable DVD player while I worked out. And like magic the time flies by and I barely notice the agony of working out, as long as I am watching something high action. From a year ago when we purchaed the elliptical to now (with huge lapses in between because of my cosmetic surgery), where I could only do about 3 minutes on it, I can now easily do 30 and sometimes more. I am not at a super high level but I am proud of myself for doing this much.

Recently in an effort to head off batwing arms at the pass, I have started doing some arm exercises on the BowFlex. Thanks to Laura, who is my go-to person for all sorts of things, she has helped suggest some good ones for me and I hope they work.

I have done some serious self-talk and convinced myself that this will take time, results will not be immediate. I have set a year deadline before I start to freak out. I want to point out that it has been suggested to me in the past by various fitness trainers that once a woman crosses thiry-five, it "becomes twice as hard" to lose weight/tone up, etc. I feel fitness trainers do women a disservice everywhere by sending them this message, because personally I had the "why bother then?" attitude. If it's going to be that much harder, why even start? But the fact that I can do my entire workout without taking Ventolin, have a lot more energy and generally feel healthier speaks in volumes to me. I have also incorporated my own high fibre/high protein style of eating into this and have significantly cut out refined white sugar (candy and pop) and carbs (chips and other starches). That is not to say that I don't eat them ever. A person has to enjoy their life at the same time. But I am cautious to not overdo it and usually I find I don't enjoy the treat as much because of the guilt that goes along with it.

Not all of this has been terrific. As I have fought to strengthen my abdominal muscles, the layer of fat over my stomach has gotten jigglier. This is because my muscles aren't pooching out as much any more (I consciously activate them whenever I can), so nothing is supporting the fat. I was quite dismayed at this until I figured it out, which is why I am still intensely trying to fat burn as much as possible.

Anyway, I'll try and mark my progress here when I think of it, but I have also been limiting my computer and television time. I have been really struggling with a lot of sciatic pain in my right side (chiropractic has done nothing for it) and sitting for extended periods of time only aggravates it.

In other news, Hayden is now able to spell and I believe is just starting to write letters...and he's not even four yet! I went for parent observation at his preschool the other day and he spelled 16 three letter words as I watched! I was mightily impressed and really hope he will be just as avid a reader as the rest of the family. Boys don't always have the same amount of interest in reading as girls do. By the next day, the teachers informed me he was beginning to spell four letter words. Yes!

My beautiful Hannah is graduating from high school and will be off to Concordia University in Montreal in the fall! Gulp! I don't know quite what to think of it. She did get accepted into three universities here as well, so we'll see what happens, but right now Concordia is pretty high on her list. And, um, who doesn't want to go to Montreal? I love it there, so I don't blame her!

Miss Kestrel is reading like a house on fire now. Once she got the basics there was no stopping her! She reads well above her age level and I am so happy abou that. She also has flow when she reads and is not stilted, which indicates to me that she is mastering reading ahead. Yay Kes!

The weather here is fantastic, so I am going to go and enjoy it now!

Wait!

2009-04-09T10:21:00.002-07:00

My Google obsession comes to fruition!!

Phoenix

2009-04-09T09:15:00.006-07:00

So this was going to be a blog post about the band Phoenix and how great they are (and it still will be), but now I have to have a bit of rant.

A nice man named Pascal kindly forwarded me the html for the Phoenix SNL videos that I mentioned yesterday. Alas, they were still inoperable. How is it possible that the actual band can't put their own performance on to their own website without NBC screwing them over?

Correct me if I am wrong, but I paid my cable bill to see the very crappy SNL show that was put on, with the only saving grace being Phoenix. I'm pretty sure that the network got paid its bajillion dollars to put on said disappointing show. If this is a matter of music copyright, then why would NBC care if Phoenix wanted to show the world their performance?

I'm starting to get very confused about these copyright laws. Does this mean that if I buy an album for my own listening pleasure, I'm not allowed to let anyone else listen to it? Is there some way that Big Brother can monitor every wedding, high school graduation and retirement so that the music companies (not the artists, mind you) get their 12 cents per play? (Why yes, yes there is!) I don't get it. Are music stores not supposed to play the music in their stores? Like, where does it end?

I'd really like to see some numbers on how record sales have been affected since the beginning of the MP3. I don't believe the invention of the cassette tape killed the music industry, did it? Are people not still buying concert tickets? I can't tell you how big of a collection of CDs I have where I have only ever listened to one song. I believe the music mucky mucks got their pound of flesh for those. Thanks for producing crap, by the way.

Anyway, Phoenix is the opposite of merde and I hope that somehow, some way you can see them or hear them perform. They have a fresh sound that is danceable and fun. Next thing we have to do it get them to Vancouver. My inner francophile is anxiously awaiting their arrival!

Acceptance

2009-04-08T19:17:00.005-07:00

Well, in true Hamster Boy fashion, acceptance comes easy to him. The second night of bracing was back to how it had always been. He called me early in the evening to take him to the bathroom and I took him again later. He did wake up at some point and call me, so I stumbled in there and ended up crashing with him, squeezed beside him on a tiny flat pillow with a blanket over my feet. Awesome. We're back to that, are we? Ah well, the more I deal with this, the more I just need to find my Zen about it. We're talking about his future here and his ability to walk. Nothing will stop me from making it go as smoothly for him as possible and I will fight tooth and nail to avoid surgery on this kid's feet.

I did end up sending an email to RCH commending them for their super emergency department and got three responses and a request to reprint the email in their newsletter with my name! Hopefully this will help keep this system going!

In the meantime, I am really grooving on this group that played on Saturday Night Live this weekend, called Phoenix. The show itself tanked miserably in my opinion. It was possibly the unfunniest SNL I've ever seen. BUT, surprisingly the band was great and I rarely listen to the music portion as it is always some group I can't stand. Of course, once I found out these guys are Parisian, so much the better. Their upcoming new album is due out on May 25 or 26th, depending where you read the date and is called Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix. I can't wait! (Sorry, I wanted to link to a video but NBC already took them all down - BOOOOOOOO!)

One last thing. Who looks completely adorable pregnant? SHE DOES (my favourite lady with the pink hair!):

The Neverending Story...

2009-04-07T06:58:00.003-07:00

Oh where to begin? I think this is the stage where most parents of a clubfoot kid start to wear down and the whole idea gets a little thin. But when I think hard enough about that, I realize that we are really not even one third of the way through this, since this will be ongoing until he is 15.

On Saturday morning around 3am, I awake to the sounds of Hayden coming into our room. Since we stopped using the brace three weeks ago, this is not unusual. He can make many visits in a night and is usually returned to his room as he drives me completely batshit crazy in my bed. I can hear him muttering and as I open my eyes I realize I can't see him anywhere. I soon discover he is on the floor crawling and complaining about his foot, "ouch.....my foot....hurts so much..." In my sleep deprived state, I figure his foot has fallen asleep from perhaps sleeping on it funny or some-such and haul him into my bed for a quick cuddle before I take him back.

5am. Repeat. This time I let him come into the bed, so I can maybe get some frickin' sleep and he lasts about an hour before husband and I are wanting to axe murder him. There is much tossing-turning, whispering, pulling and breaking of my hair. Husband takes him back to bed, where he immediately and loudly notifies us he is disgruntled. Heavy on the gruntle.

About half an hour later I hear him again. This time he is trying to go to the bathroom and it is abundantly obvious something is wrong with his foot. I get up to investigate and husband joins me. We take him downstairs to check it out. I thoroughly inspect his foot for......what? I see no bruising, no swelling, so sign of anything amiss. I try to think back to the previous day. No easy task when my brain is still mush. Nope. Nada.

He positively refuses to put any weight on the foot and tells me it hurts when I apply pressure to the bone on the top of the foot (the talus). Now I am concerned. He's been out of the brace for about three weeks and I'm thinking it could be a relapse. Husband and I hem and haw about what to do, but we decide to give it a couple of hours. Fast forward to mid morning and there is no improvement. We decide he needs to go to the hospital. Here's where I break into a cold sweat thinking about the fabulous BC Children's Hospital Emergency (heavy on the sarcasm) department where you are guaranteed a surly triage nurse, a three hour wait minimum in the waiting area and a cesspool of disgusting sick people whose kids only have the flu and should not be there, but insist on touching every toy and surface with their germy, snotty hands. Shudder.

Then I twig on the brilliant idea of taking him to Royal Columbian Hospital Emergency because that's where Dr. Pirani's clinic is and if he ends up needing to see him, then the x-rays and whatever are already there! Inspired! It's about a twenty minute drive compared to the two minute drive, but the highway is clear and it's smooth sailing.

Here's where I put in a plug for one of the best emergency departments I have ever encountered. I arrive and check in with the receptionist in emergency. She takes Hayden's medical number and checks to make sure all of our information is still current. She puts a bracelet on him. We are directed to wait in the designated area and a triage nurse will call us shortly. Hayden has to go to the bathroom, of course so we trudge to the other end of the long hallway because the closest bathroom is being renovated. Naturally they call us while we are doing that, but another mother kindly informs me, so I let the nurse know we are back.

We get called to triage and she takes more detailed medical info, asks what the trouble is and takes Hayden's vitals. Back to the waiting area. This is all in a relatively small zone, so it's not like you are hiking back and forth anywhere. After a few minutes the admitting nurse calls us and she prints out the paperwork and directs us to an area called "the minor treatment waiting area". Now think about this for a minute and bask in the excellence that is order and intelligence. Does it not make sense to separate the heart attacks and amputees from the dog bites and minor spills? Sure does to me!

Once settled in there amongst a few others, a nurse comes in and tells another patient her ultrasound is scheduled for 3:30. What?!?! They give you a time?!?!? What kind of magical efficiency is this? Are demons at play? No, I think that somewhere along the way someone figured out that the primary cause of anxiety in the waiting room of a hospital is the waiting. And the not knowing. It seems about five or ten minutes before the kindly nurse escorts Hayden and I to the paediatric area and we are given a room. Hayden is stoked about the "high up bed" and he is content to read his I Spy books and munch on some snacks while we wait.

Presently a doctor turns up and checks him out and decides an x-ray will be in order. Minutes later an orderly arrives with a wheeled chair which Hayden thinks is awesome and he is wrapped in a blanket for the little journey to radiology. Throw Hayden into a room with three cute, young and female x-ray technicians and what do you think happens? The charm is oozing from his pores! The photos get taken and we're back to the little room. Approximately five minutes or so later, the nurse comes in and informs me that she has asked the doctor to look at the x-rays, which leads me to suspect it is the nurses who keep this system flowing since they are the ones who get yelled at the most.

The doctor returns and informs me that nothing has turned up on the pictures, to just keep an eye on him for the next couple of days and come back if it doesn't improve. So, it's a complete mystery still, but I am so impressed with the fact that we made it in and out of there in one and three quarter hours that I don't care! I have never left a hospital emergency before the three hour mark. Ever. Hayden spends the rest of the day and evening crawling around, or having one of us carry him. Did I mention he's about 45 pounds?

The next morning he manages to put weight on it, but is limping heavily. He's doesn't seem to be in tremendous pain, but it clearly is bothering him. Poor little fella. It would help if we knew what it was. In the meantime I have contacted Dr. Pirani's secretary (who is also a friend) and have told her I am going to have to bring him to the clubfoot clinic on Monday. She says that is fine, but warns me it might be especially nutty there and says I should come closer to the last appointment. This works out fine because husband needs the car and can drop us off on the way.

But for the rest of Sunday, I am scrutinizing Hayden's foot and worrying and wondering. Husband and I are already deciding he has to go back in the brace and a few things actually twig in my mind. First of all, Hayden has had major growth since September. He has grown two sizes in clothing and although his foot size hasn't changed much, I feel it would still affect his Achilles' tendons. I remember that an experienced mom once told me to watch out for the growth spurts because this is a common time for relapse. And now am I just being paranoid, or is his foot actually looking curved after only three weeks out of the brace? Second, I remember that the style of orthopaedic shoes Hayden wears has developed a quick release system to remove the bar from the shoes. We haven't been using it because we still have the old style of shoes that don't work with this system. But since part of our reasoning for taking him out of the brace has been that it is really hard to haul him out of a bottom bunk that has a side rail when he is dead asleep and wearing a dangling contraption from his feet, this would alleviate that issue somewhat. *palm to forehead*

The actual wait time on Monday ends up only being about an hour, which is fabulous. Dr. Pirani checks him all out and asks a bunch of questions about the foot that was bothering him. Hayden performs wonderfully and seems to have no pain at all even though he has still been favouring the foot. Dr. Pirani asks about the bracing and I tell him we did take him out of it but are going to put him back in. I also mention that the foot looks curved to me and his expression says everything. Dr. Pirani is a person that can give you a look and you know exactly what he is thinking. So now I know - the foot is curved slightly and bracing is back in order. Considering I am prepared for the worst, such as casts again, this is okay with me. We still do not have an answer as to what occurred with his foot on Saturday. My best guess is that when he hopped out of bed that morning, he turned it and strained it. One would expect a kid to cry if that happened, but time and again, Hayden has proven he's a tough kid. He will often not cry at tumbles and spills. I'm so used to girls who cry over paper cuts that this is definitely a new experience.

In the meantime, putting his brace back on last night proved to be an exercise in heartbreak. He was devastated. His cry just pierced my heart and I found myself promising him everything under the sun, just to make it ok. We have set up a reward system for him and we'll see how that goes. Around 11:30 he woke up and wanted them off, and the way he asked in such a tearful voice I almost removed them. But he was satisfied with me loosening them slightly and made it the rest of the night. I am happy if he gets ten hours a night in them. I am less than pleased that this will no doubt affect his (and my) sleep pattern again, but for this kid to have straight feet and no surgery I will undergo water torture if I have to.

So for now, back to the drawing board.

Update on Yesterday

2009-03-10T07:33:00.007-07:00

Hey, guess what? 4:40 am still feels exactly like 3:40 am when one is disturbed! (mutters..."stupid time change"...mutters)

Well, two posts in two days? I'd better not get your hopes up!

Since it was snowing like a mother trucker yesterday, I decided it would be best if Hayden and I caught rapid transit to the hospital as it goes straight there...if you get the right train. Not having been on the Skytrain in some time, I was merrily riding along and then suddenly realized I was on the bridge over to Surrey in the complete wrong direction of the hospital. Sigh. Get off at first available stop, walk across platform, wait for another train, get on and ride back to previous stop where I should have transferred were I not on the correct train, which I was not.

As that particular stop is not a walk across platform, I had to drag Hayden down a flight of stairs, walk across to the other side, back up another flight of stairs and wait for the next right train. We made it to the hospital about 15 minutes late. No big whoop since we would never have gotten in at that time. That's what I am telling myself. At least, thankfully, the overhead walkway has returned to that stop. They had removed it to put in a building and had erected a steel staircase forcing you to go down about 50 steps and then walk up an excruciatingly steep hill.

Registration was a nightmare. I have never seen it backed up like that before. Where I usually pluck number 5 or 6 from the box, I got number 31 and they were on 23 when I arrived. In fact, it was so busy it took me quite some time to notice the man who was handcuffed and shackled sitting in the corner with his two corrections officers. I wondered why I didn't spot his bright red jumper earlier on? While waiting, I took a peek at the clubfoot clinic waiting room too see how bad it was and it was bad. Basically the waiting area is a hallway and it was full to capacity.

Once we finally got into the waiting zone it was almost 12. Our appointment was for 11. I proceeded to feed Hayden all of the snacks I had brought and ran to the gift shop for some other things. I was too afraid to head over to the Tim Horton's as I kept expecting them to call for us. Turns out, I could have gone there a couple of times because we didn't get called in until 3. Yep, in the afternoon. Let me fast forward this a little bit.

More waiting inside the clinic, doctor comes and shows in two students who he leaves with us for awhile, finally he returns. After examining Hayden's feet, he informs me - to my absolute shock - that Hayden has lost ground since the last visit in July. WHAT??

It turns out that Hayden has lost about 5% of his dorsiflexion on both sides, which is not good. It's not dire either, but it will have to be monitored. (To know what dorsiflexion is, stick a foot out in front of you and point your toes up - you are now dorsiflexed) There were even some changes in his x-rays and that was surprising, too. We haven't changed anything about what we have been doing over the last 8 months, except for very recently he was having the occasional night out of the brace. We can only guess it is because Hayden has grown quite a lot in the last six months. At the beginning of the school year I bought him size 4 pajamas and he could now easily wear a 5, if not a 6.

So here's where we stand. I felt that based on what Dr. Pirani said to me that he was going to release Hayden from the brace in June anyway. The risk of relapse falls only another 5 percent after age 4 and never drops to 0, until they have reached skeletal maturity (age 15). There will always be a risk of relapse for Hayden and what the doctor said was if he is going to relapse, he's going to relapse, whether we take him out of the brace now or in June. He left it in our hands, basically. He also cautioned that taking him out of the brace now would make it harder to put him back in it later. I am okay with this as I am well versed in the machinations of preschoolers and their torture methods. My skin is thick if that ends up being the case.

Now, after I saw him, I had a discussion with Lisa, the orthotist (who I love). She was a little more optomistic and said that she felt Hayden is a 50/50 kid and there is no guarantee that he is going to relapse. She suggested stretches and exercises designed to stretch out the Achilles' tendon, which we will definitely do. Also, running around on the beach in Hawaii will be excellent for him, so maybe we can write this trip off as medical? Har.

Here's the thing. Hayden's feet were terrible at birth. Here is a photo:

We are lucky to have come this far without more complications. If it is the case that he will relapse, I am 100% confident that Dr. Pirani will do everything he can to avoid surgery, as he has already done. He would recast, re-do the tenotomy if necessary and re-brace him before he ever cut open his feet. So, whatever happens, happens. We will do our best to avoid it, but it really is out of our hands.

We Interrupt This Regularly Scheduled Blog Lapse...

2009-03-09T07:22:00.005-07:00

...to say WHAT THE HECK? Snow. In Vancouver. In March. Did someone wind back the calendar? Because the last I checked we JUST put the clocks forward, which would actually put us one hour closer to Spring!

Ah well, I'm sure the rain will be on its heels and it will all be gone in no time. Maybe.

So I've been very quiet and mostly that is because I haven't had much to say. But one piece of good news: my youngest brother and his wife had a baby boy on February 16th. He came about 6 days early and is absolutely beautiful. I am so happy for them!

Today Hayden and I head to see Dr. Pirani and I am about to ask him something I never thought I would before Hayden turned four. I am going to ask if it is okay for Hayden to stop wearing his brace a few months early. I know! Hayden will be four in about three and a half months, or 101 days if you want to be exact, so it's not like it's a year or something.

We have been having endless problems over the last couple of months with Hayden not being able to take himself to the bathroom in the night because he can't get out of bed with the brace on. And even though we wake him twice a night and at the expense of our backs, lug him to the toilet in his brace, he can still wake up as he is peeing. We also feel the brace is affecting his sleep now. I mean, think about it. At night you tend to swell up from being all warm and cozy. Imagine shoes strapped tight on your feet and think how that might disturb your sleep?

The last visit we had with Dr. Pirani and the more recent visit we had with Lisa (the orthotist), Hayden's feet are showing no sign of relapse.We did have orthotics made for him because of his non-existent arch (you should see them they are so cute!) and those have been fine. He didn't even notice them in his shoes. Lisa pointed out one potential concern that I am going to address with Dr. P today, so we'll see what happens. I'm not going to get my hopes up too high and if the answer is no, then so be it. We only have a few more months anyway. But it would be nice to not have to bring them to Maui with us.

Oh hey! We're going to Maui! On Thursday! Away from the snow! Frankly, all I can think about right now is getting the actual trip out of the way before I can feel relaxed and happy to be in warmer climates. And speaking of that, I had to do the dreaded bathing suit shop. I had heard of a store way in the middle of nowhere that had about 50 different brands of swimsuits. So I rounded up the neighbour and we drove out there yesterday. Thank goodness for Mapquest and GPS is all I can say because it was a long drive. BUT, the store did not disappoint - there were many, many swimsuits! I managed to find a tankini that did not make me look like a sausage and it also has a built-in bra to support the girls, so that was good. My friend managed to find something even cuter. She's quite a bit skinnier than me, so it looked adorable on her. They even had the 2008 models on sale. Did you know that swimsuits are like cars?

I have to say the prices were medium to WTF? Like, for a little filmy cover up skirt, I am not going to pay $50. There is just no way, when I can head to the local fabric store and get a whole yard of the same fabric for $10 or less. But, making an actual swimsuit would be much trickier so I am willing to pay a bit more for that. All in all, a good trip and now I know where it is!

Of course looking out the window and the snow, it feels weird to think I will be wearing a bathing suit in just a few days.

We now return you to your regular programming.

...snow...Snow...SNOW!

2009-01-05T07:08:00.003-08:00

I seem to be the only person in my universe that is getting a kick out of all the snow here. I mean, c'mon people - this only happens once every FORTY YEARS here! Forty years ago I was a newborn and therefore could not appreciate this kind of fantastic weather.

Admittedly, we are not equipped for this type of weather here in Vancouver. We have, what? Six snowplows to service the whole city? And I think I've seen only one of them go by, ONCE. (and it was not on our street) I know you're part of a union, City of V, but hire some folks with their snow blowers or something, m'kay? EVERYONE IS FREAKING OUT!

Now, don't get me wrong, I don't enjoy being OUT in the snow other than to take a nice brisk walk and enjoy the quiet. But I could sit at a window, while it's dark and all the street lamps are on, and watch it for hours. Of course I got immense entertainment from watching the drivers frantically trying to get up the steep main drag by our place the other night. Well, I felt bad for them anyway. What ponders me is why go out? What is so important in their world that they can't stay put? I'd love to be able to read minds and find out.

Several days back Laini Taylor (my favourite author) posted a video of what was going on in Portland. It might have been hilarious had it not been so horrifying! I haven't seen any of that sort of thing here on our street, but many many people have been stuck. We've broken the windshield wipers on our van and have to wait a jillion years for the parts to come in. (aside: Why is that? Why is it that the dealerships NEVER have the piece you need?) My husband is having a stroke that the snow isn't gone yet. I claim he has PTSD from all the years he had to deal with this in Montreal. A kind of snow shellshock, you might say.

In other news, I finally got Hamster Boy the proper boy haircut he needed (photos will follow when I find a camera to take some). It was getting really bushy and long and we hadn't really been giving him proper haircuts yet, more like trims. And then a bunch of our friends came over and two of the boys (age 9-11 range) that came had such long hair they looked like street urchins. It kind of sicked me out. It might have looked better if it was washed or combed, but I decided then and there that Hayden was getting his CHOPPED. And boy is it ever!

On the knitting front, I finally finished a project I started over three years ago and gave up on. After many hours of struggling to complete it, it's done. And I kind of hate it now. I'm not happy with how it turned out at all. Sigh. Waste of yarn. This is why I don't make things for myself. The amount of time and love you pour into it and you could have bought it at Winners for one nth of the price it cost you to make. Bah!

Back to school today! The last couple of days have dragged considerably and Momma needs a break. And what fun thing do I get to do today? Go to the dentist! I have a tooth that's driving me nuts and it has to get fixed NOW. Wheee!

I'm off then.

Oh Man Am I Waxing Romantic Today

2008-12-24T09:51:00.002-08:00

Snow has this strange effect on me. It makes me feel a little hysterical and I mean that in a good way. I truly get to experience "mixed emotions" on a day like this; where I feel like laughing and crying at the same time. Even the grumps who complain about the snow (and believe me, there are many) can't get me down. No, I don't like to be cold and I don't particularly enjoy being out in the snow for extended periods of time, but I could sit at the window and watch all day and night.

It just feels so.....magical to me. I rewind in my mind to childhood and let myself feel the wonder of it over and over again.

I like what it does to me.

Snow

2008-12-18T10:53:00.002-08:00

Snow
It won't be long before we'll all be there with snow
Snow
I want to wash my hands, my face and hair with snow

Snow
I long to clear a path and lift a spade of snow
Snow
Oh, to see a great big man entirely made of snow

Where it's snowing
All winter through
That's where I want to be
Snowball throwing
That's what I'll do
How I'm longing to ski
Through the snow-oh-oh-oh-oh

Last night I went for a walk with my neighbour and friend. It was past 8 o'clock and most people were hunkered down for the evening. It was considerably warmer than the previous two days, evidenced by the fact that it had snowed the better part of the day. Big, fat, fluffy flakes that went on and on. Decorated houses shone brightly and the air was relatively still. It was magical.

I know I often wax poetic about the autumn, but last night was the perfect winter night to be out, enjoying someone's company and enjoying the crisp air. I could have walked on forever, but I'm glad it was only an hour and a half - my legs were quite stiff this morning! I returned to my love and spent a quiet evening with him in our cozy living room.

I felt giddy again this morning as the packed snow crunched and squeaked beneath my boots. I don't know why I love snow so much. I don't care to be out in it much; I used to ski but gave that up ages ago; I don't really like to be cold. I suppose it is because there is just something so cleansing about it. For a brief time the city is covered under a blanket of pure white. And here in this city, one has to take advantage of it because all too soon the wicked rain appears and turns the city back to dismal grey.

Today it is much colder again, but I hear tell we shall be bestowed with more of the lovely white stuff on Sunday. I plan on another walk and the only thing that would make this even better than last night's stroll would be for it to be actually snowing. Crossing my fingers!

The Friday Night Knitting Club, Knit Two

2008-11-28T10:59:00.008-08:00

Earlier this year a friend of mine loaned me The Friday Night Knitting Club by Kate Jacobs as she knows I like to knit. In fact, I am obsessive about knitting, just ask my friends and family) I took it with me on our family summer vacation and read it in only a few days, between sightseeing and beach-going. It was hard for me to put down. I got very invested in the characters and their lives and the ending held something I never saw coming.

As well as the story being about a knitting shop, throughout the book were references to knitting added in by the author, a feature that delighted me. To me, the theme of this book was "beginnings"; each of these very different women with their own separate stories trying to forge their way ahead in the world and, hopefully leave their mark. I thought about them for the remainder of my trip.

Then lo and behold, I was notified of a sequel, Knit Two (just released on November 25th). How thrilled was I? I could reconnect with these wonderful women and see where they went from where we left off.

Five years later, the women of the Friday Night Knitting Club are struggling with a profound loss as they still seek to etch out their place in the world. Without aggravating repetition, the book is written so that you can catch up quite easily and not have to refer back to the first novel. This story is beautifully written in a style that is so easy to follow and I was once again captured by these wonderful people. This book carries a new theme, "letting go". Letting go of old hurts, ideals, lifestyles and relationships; letting go of fears, memories, love. I found myself examining my own life and seeing where things could change, for the better. Is there something I can let go of?

Both of these books made me cry. There. I said it. I cry over books. Was it good or bad crying? I will not say. You have to go and get yourself a copy of each of these books because they belong in your collection. Or, since the holiday season is upon us, perhaps there is someone in your life that would enjoy two very well written books, knitter or otherwise. Please see the above li9nks to get more information about either book, and the author.

I was honoured to have been able to read both of them.

I'll Have to Do Better...

2008-10-21T15:57:00.002-07:00

As a 1930s wife, I am
Poor

Take the test!

A Trip Down Memory Lane

2008-09-28T10:26:00.004-07:00

I stumbled across a paper I had written (and presented) when I was taking a re-entry course after giving birth to my first daughter. Before I'd had her, I'd been a nanny, so could not go back to the job. Instead, I took a government sponsored course that taught me some computer and administrative skills. Little did I realize that this would be the type of work I'd do from then on and truly enjoy. Anyway, the course was for women who were either trying to get back in to the work force after rearing children or for those who had unexpectedly lost jobs and wanted new or different skills.

We covered a variety of the basics, such as math and english and one of the units required us to make a presentation on the topic of our choice. For some reason I chose "Communication". (I am one of those people who will get a sudden inspiration and go with it, so I did.) I uncovered this while looking for another old poem of mine and I got quite the kick out of it and how much times have changed since I wrote it, even though it technically has not been that long. I had included some props and hand gestures, so I will note those in brackets. I was twenty-three when I wrote this. Here we go:

January 28, 1992
"Communication"

If I were to walk up to any one of you and do this: (perform sign-language sign), how many of you would know what I'd just said? How about if I did this? (cross legs, jump up and down) Now how many of you would know that I was trying to say? Well, in case you're wondering, I just said "where's the bathroom?" in sign-language.

Good afternoon (sign). I am happy to talk to you about communication.

We could not function without communication. Spoken language has always been a method of communicating for us, whether we speak English, French, Spanish or Chinese. But what about those of us that do not have the privilege of speech? Or for certain reasons cannot or must not use speech?

I have the privilege of knowing several people who are deaf, and although I am not fluent in sign-language, they have opened up a whole new world of communication for me and I find it quite easy to talk with them because as I showed you to begin with, body language is universal. And that in itself is a method of communicating. Our facial and body expressions can say a lot. For examples, a smile can express happiness, friendliness, nervousness, or even mischief. A downcast expression along with hanging head and slumped shoulders can mean sadness, depression or tiredness. A wave means hello, we can jump for joy or stomp with excitement, we can smack our foreheads because we feel foolish or because we've forgotten something.

Now, what if we have the ability to speak, but are unable to use it because of distance say, or because the information needed is confidential?

Before the telephone was invented, morse code was used. Here is an example of what morse code looks like when printed out (prop, word=hello) but it would sound like a series of "dits" and "dahs"; the "dit" sound being the dot and the "dah" sound being the dash. As well, semifour has been used, which is the use of two flags that are divided in half diagonally, with one half of the flag being red and the other half being white (hold up). Letters are formed in the way you hold your arms. For example, this would spell "hi" (act out). Mostly today, these methods are used by Boy Scouts, Girl Guides, the military and probably others that I am unaware of.

With today's modern technology, much communicating can be done now with the introduction of telephones, computers, fax machines and fibre optics.

In certain large companies, computers are what we call "on line" with one another. Messages can be sent from a computer in one city to another computer in another city simply by using a telephone line, or modem as it is called. I worked for a company once where all you had to do was type in your message and hit a button, and your information would appear on the printer in Prince George, Calgary or wherever you'd sent it. (I can't remember what company this was)

Another company I was employed by (Sears) had all of their computerized cash registers on line across the nation, so when a sale was rung in B.C., the main computer back east made a note that certain items had been sold and more would need to be sent to replace them. This eliminated a lot of paperwork and made the company operate much more efficiently.

Fax machines have changed communications quite drastically. Where you once had to wait for days for something important to come in the mail, or spend lots to send it by courier, you now can have it in your hand within minutes. This is another form of communication that makes use of the phone lines. If only Alexander Graham Bell could see what he started by inventing the telephone! And now with fibre optics being so precise and exact, communication will be a breeze.

Over the years, there have been many different ways to communicate from smoke signals to the aboriginal bushman's telephone, but nothing can beat that special smile that says I love you from your little child. And that's communication at its finest. Thank you (sign).

***
I remember that most of the ladies just sat there looking at me with blank expressions on their faces because they'd all talked about their dogs or twelve step programs and I'd just gone way off to another dimension. But I'd always enjoyed public speaking for the most part and like I said, I got an idea and I went with it. Besides, no one told us what to talk about!

I think the best part is how amazed I am at technology only sixteen some-odd years ago. Had I known where it was headed, it might have blown my mind! To think that I would even have the capability of doing this, blogging, would have been beyond my imagination I think!

So, I just wanted to share a moment from my past (and some bad writing) and hopefully it has amused you as much as it did me!

My Mastopexy and Augmentation Mammoplasty

2008-08-27T10:17:00.009-07:00

...or otherwise known as "Breast Lift with Implants", or as I like to call it, "Lift and Stuff".

Yes, this is the "procedure" I referred to way back in June. I finally feel ready to blog about it three months after the fact.

I first started thinking about this surgery about a year ago when I realized that the "girls" were just never going to repair themselves and look attractive again. I had major sagging due to breastfeeding. My breasts had gotten quite large during pregnancy and breastfeeding, but I was not one of those lucky ladies that got to keep the luscious breasts, fat and all. The fat all but disappeared from my breasts, leaving them hanging like sad empty sacks. I could not find bras to fit me properly and they were uncomfortable to boot. Having a larger set of hips (which also grew thanks to pregnancy), I looked disproportionate and clothing was becoming a chore. I basically hid behind baggy tops.

I want to start off by saying that my husband in no way influenced my in my decision to have this surgery. It was all me. All my idea. I say this because a certain relative of my husband's seems to think that women only do these surgeries for the benefit of men and nothing could be further from the truth. He never once suggested I should have it done or expressed that he'd like me to have it done, and was very supportive only in that he wanted me to be happy. Of course maybe that was before he realized he was picking up the tab, heh heh! Interestingly enough, my twin and I had both come to the decision to do this surgery independently of each other. I guess we decided to bring 40 in with a bang. She, however, did not require the lift, so she had only the augmentation done.

I had seen the work of my surgeon on another woman and was blown away by how realistic the breasts looked. Many of us, including me, have the impression that all "boob jobs" look the same - fake. So I booked a preliminary visit with him and away we went. I had to wait several months to get in to see him and I can honestly say it was worth the wait. Once in his office I was interviewed by one of his assistants and then waited to see him. At that time I was sort of hoping I would not need a lift and could just "fix things up" with some implants. To my dismay, this was not the case and it was at that point that I nearly changed my mind about the whole thing. But he explained to me that placing an implant into a sagging breast would not correct the problem, only worsen it, that he made every effort to minimize scarring and that healing time was roughly the same as for a straight augmentation. He point blank told me that he would not just put implants into me and if that was what I wanted, I'd need to find another surgeon. I appreciated his candor and also the fact that he was very conservative about things like size. I left with the quote, a feeling of trepidation, and a lot on my mind.

I had three months from the date of the quote to book my surgery (in order to get that same price). It honestly took me a few weeks to sort out how I felt about it. I have a definite thing about scars. It took me years to get over my c-section scar, even though it healed much better than most other scars of the same kind that I've seen on women. What I had to wrestle with was, could I willingly put scars onto my body for the sake of what most people view as vanity?

I decide I could live with it as the only people who were really going to see them were myself and my husband. I chose the cohesive gel implants as they felt the most realistic to me and had less risk attached to them as regular silicon (from what I've read). The saline were never a consideration for me as I do not like the look of them at all. In my pre-operative visit, the doctor gave me the choice between two different sizes which I got to try in a bra. I chose the slightly larger size (there was about 30cc difference) as it fit my existing curves. The size was 322ccs on each side.

In the meantime, I had decided to fly out to Calgary to join my sister for her surgery as her husband was not able to accompany her. I'm so glad I did. I got to witness first hand what the post surgical phase was like. Now, her surgeon had prescribed all manner of great painkillers and whatnots, so I thought "this'll be a breeze!" Ha. Remember my guy? The conservative one? He wrote me a prescription for Tylenol 3s and an antibiotic and instructed me to get Benadryl (to help me sleep), Gravol (obvious) and Ibuprofen (swelling). Well, Benadryl does indeed make me sleep, but it also makes me intensely crabby, so I avoided that one. The others of course, I got.

I tried not to be very nervous about my upcoming surgery, even when I found an animated video of the procedure.

We found out my surgery was going to be very early in the morning, which sort of temporarily messed up our plans. I had made arrangements for Hayden to spend the week at my mom's (actually she volunteered her services, for which I am eternally grateful) but we thought we'd be able to take Kes to school that day. There was a solution, though, as my sister had volunteered to come down and return the favour. So she was able to take Kes to school while I had the surgery done.

When we arrived at the surgery centre, I was not really very nervous. They shoo'ed hubby away fairly quickly and told him they'd call him. I was then left on my own in the room. Everyone came in and introduced themselves; the assisting nurse and the anesthesiologist, which was great and put me way at ease. Finally Dr. Mosher arrived and began to doodle on my chest with his black felt pen. I stared at the ceiling and waited for him to be done. I never really looked at it and I don't know why. I'm curious now.

I was escorted into the surgical theatre and climbed onto the skinny bed. An i.v. was started, the b.p. cuff applied and leggings were put on my legs along with these inflatable leg sleeves that periodically inflated and deflated to prevent blood clots. I felt like I was on a space ship! Everything seemed so science fiction and state of the art.

Before I knew it, the sleeping drugs were applied and I was deliciously drifting off to dreamland. The next thing I knew, the nurse was calling my name to wake me up. I was initially quite drowsy and a little discombobulated. The auto blood pressure cuff was still on, as were the leg sleeves and now there was also the blood oxygen metre on my finger. Between the two things inflating and deflating, the tight clip on my finger AND the oxygen mask over my mouth and nose, I felt quite claustrophobic and found it hard not to panic for a little while. I closed my eyes and tried to doze. Dr. Mosher came by briefly and patted my head, telling me everything had gone fine. I'd like him to know that meant a lot to me. It made him more human to me and compassionate. I think there is a tendency for people to think that because you've inflicted such a thing on yourself, you don't deserve sympathy. At least that was what I was expecting.

Eventually, the machines and things were removed and the nurse asked me how I was feeling. I told her hungry! All she could offer me was a freezie, but I accepted it willingly because I was starving. She gave me another after I inhaled the first one. Hubby arrived and post-op instructions were given to him and me. It was shortly after lunchtime and we had a bit of a drive as we were out in the 'burbs.

We had called my sis to see where she was at and she was home when we got there. She had gone and bought tummy-friendly foods and a beautiful orchid plant (which I have since killed, sorry Cath!) I had been warned not to do anything outside of personal care, so I left things to the others. The drugs started to wear off and I presently became aware of two very large protrusions on my chest. It was hard to tell much about them because they were bandaged and a large compression garment had been put onto me. I had been told to wear this garment for three weeks and then could switch to a regular bra. I wore it for about two months, mostly at night because it was the most comfortable.

Since I could not shower for the first week to allow the incisions to heal, I did not really look at my breasts all that much, but after a couple of days, they were so swollen that they looked like they were trying to escape in opposite directions. I literally could fit my entire hand between them and I feared the skin between them would tear, it was stretched so tight!

Pain was minimal to be honest. Sure I took pain killers as I needed them but there was never a moment when I thought 'what have I done?'. There was never unbearable pain, just a lot of discomfort as the body tried to allow for the implants. It truly felt like I'd done a massive pectoral workout and needed to breastfeed at the same time. Most of the sensations I experienced were identical to when I was breastfeeding; ie. tingling, shooting pains, prickling, popping and tenderness.

The only "bad" thing that happened was within the first few days due to the antibiotic. It became apparent on day two or three that something had upset my digestive tract and I had pretty bad diarrhea. I called the pharmacist to see if this was a side effect and he said yes, but it was getting to the point where I couldn't cope emotionally with it as I was spending so much time on the toilet, so I called the surgeon's office. The assistant told me to stop taking the drugs and that if it did not clear up, I'd have to get a different prescription as a bacteria may have formed. Nice. Lucky for me this did not happen and being fairly confident in my body's ability to fight infection I did not worry that I was unprotected.

I had a follow up four days after the surgery and the bandaging was removed. There was special surgical tape over all the incisions and I was informed that this would be changed at my next follow up a few weeks away.

I think it probably took me about three weeks to feel fairly pain-free and I began to experiment with my bras. To my delight, all of my old bras still fit...the way they were supposed to. However, the underwire bothered my lower incisions a lot and I had to remove it. Since I had been hoping to buy new bras, I was willing to sacrifice them! I also purchased two bras without underwire (hard to find, let me tell you). The surgical tape was replaced and I was given a roll of it to keep it up. I was never instructed on how long to keep the tape on, just that it helped minimize scarring, so I actually still have a few pieces here and there on parts I feel need attention.

After a few weeks, I developed what is known as a Mondor's Cord on the underside of each breast. Funny enough, the one under my right breast was bulging yet did not hurt. I was experiencing pain on the underside of my left breast and could only tell it was related to a blood vessel because when I touched the area and let go, I could see the blood refill a vessel under the skin. I'm pretty veiny so it was hard to miss. I was told by the surgeon's office that I could take Ibuprofen and use warm compresses for the discomfort. It disappeared pretty quickly.

Since then I have enjoyed shopping for new tops to highlight my new "assets". I never wore v-necks shirts and now have several. I am more confident and I feel much happier when I look in the mirror. At the three month mark, there is still healing going on, which I expected based on the material the surgeon gave me to read. My right breast healed much faster than my left and there is still numbness in the nipple and areola on the left side, but I am confident that feeling will return in time. Nerves don't heal overnight and I'm pretty sure more than a few of them were disrupted.

Overall, I would say the experience has been a positive one. Advice? Try not to have a three year old around if you have this surgery done! The worst part was him wanting to snuggle me all the time and not being able to let him. Sleeping was difficult for several weeks, so sometimes I dozed through the day if I could. All I can say is this: if you are seriously considering this surgery or even just the augmentation, make sure you weigh all the pros and cons. If you think it will make you feel better about yourself and help with the way clothing fits etc., then it probably will. Most people in my circle of friends have been very supportive and even interested in hearing about the process, some that even surprised me. Most people I know who have had it done do not regret it. I am excited to see the "end" result, which in my books will be a year from now. I'll keep you posted! ;0)

The Dangerous Days of Daniel X

2008-08-17T16:07:00.006-07:00

I've had the pleasure of being able to read this delightful book by James Patterson. Already a fan of his Maximum Ride series, this book was a surprise and an honour to read.

In his effort to encourage young boys to read, he has created a wonderful concept, rich and colourful characters and non-stop excitement. It is a fact that boys read less than girls and do not consider it to be a pleasurable activity. This book will hopefully change that.

As you get to know the character Daniel and his particular "talents", you see a large story unfolding before you that involves danger at every turn and I was relieved to realize that it will take more than one book to get to the final resolution of the tale. His sometimes not so solitary journey takes you places you would never imagine.

Even though it is a young people's novel, as an adult I enjoyed the story immensely and had my nose in the book until I had finished it, which only took me hours. I can't wait until my son is old enough to read it!

I don't want to give any of the story away, and I encourage you to purchase a copy and find out about this cool character yourselves. I look forward to more and bigger things from James Patterson!

A Meme

2008-07-21T08:33:00.004-07:00

I got this one from Megg and really liked the idea. Plus it was fun!

Here´s how you do it: type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr search, using only the first page, choose an image, copy and paste each of the URLs into the mosaic maker (3 columns, 4 rows) Make sure you set up an account first because it won't remember your pictures if you do it after.

The questions:
1. What is your first name?
2. What is your favorite food?
3. What high school did you attend?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. Who is your celebrity crush?
6. Favorite drink?
7. Dream vacation?
8. Favorite dessert?
9. What do you want to be when you grow up?
10.What do you love most in life?
11. One word to describe you.
12. Your Flickr name.

Here are the photo credits:
1. Heather in snow, 2. Butter chicken, 3. 1979 - BC, Clinton.jpg, 4. PURPLE HAZE, 5. Dwayne Johnson_1, 6. Typhoo Tea bags, 7. Not available, 8. Vanilla Bean Crème Brûlée, 9. writer's teeth, 10. Reference Mosaic: Creative Commons Textures, 11. Day 68 :: touch, 12. This Moon shines for you...

Heather 4.0

2008-06-25T21:18:00.003-07:00

I notice it has been a long time since I last blogged. To be honest, I have developed a love-hate thing with blogging over the last while and hate seems to win out most times. But the last few weeks have been eventful and I felt I should share.

First off, Hamster Boy turned three on the 19th of June. There was no real celebration, but he has deemed it necessary to step up his bad behaviour to acknowledge it. Actually, he has his moments and the best times are when he is alone with me. But we can still butt heads and timeouts are common.

Next, I hit a milestone birthday on the 23rd of June and turned 40 (hence the title). I can't say it feels all that different from 39, except that I feel this decade will be pretty good as it means that ten years from now my kids will be 13, 16 and 27. I think 50 will be even sweeter. Some of my lady friends took me out to make it all official and we had dinner and saw Sex and the City. I enjoyed the movie more than I thought I would.

I had a procedure done at the beginning of June. Well more than a procedure, a cosmetic surgery. I struggled about whether to blog about it or not as it was a fairly personal thing and since I am still technically in the healing process, I think I will delay blogging about it fully. Stay tuned for that.

Sleep, Or the Lack Thereof...

2008-05-24T16:48:00.003-07:00

When she doesn't get enough sleep, anywhere will do:

When he doesn't nap, an injection of Spiderman 1 works:

I Heart Joss Whedon

2008-05-19T07:45:00.004-07:00

Just when I begin to despair over the state of television, Joss Whedon pulls through for me again!

Go here, watch this. I'm too lazy to repost it. I have to wait until next year, but it will make the rest of this year worth it! Whee! (P.S. Naturally I knew this show was coming, but hadn't seen anything about it until now.)

By way of an aside, I got a sunburn yesterday - first of the year. It's tradition, ya know.

Sweatin' the Oldies

2008-05-17T20:14:00.002-07:00

Hubby and I got a BowFlex recently and I have to say...WE LOVE IT! It's gotta be the coolest thing around to build muscle and endurance. When we first started out, hubby insisted that we work out together so we could sort of be accountability partners. I didn't want to, because I can be very self-conscious about that sort of thing, but I have to say it's been really great spending some quality time together and actually getting some exercise.

Usually hubby goes on the elliptical machine first and then I come out, do some stretching and then we do our little circuit we have worked out. I'm trying to work myself up to the cardio part of the routine because I find it so hard. People just don't understand how I can get so pooped so fast. Literally three minutes on that thing has me gasping for breath...on the lowest speed. Here's a suggestion to see what it is like to be asthmatic and have reduced lung function - breathe through a straw for, like, an hour and see how you feel. Go on! It's FUN! I've had so many people make helpful suggestions on what to do about that, but it is just going to take time for me to slowly build up my cardio function. It could possibly take years.

Anyway, I'm gonna do my best because I like what I've been feeling already in the "things aren't quite so saggy and jiggly" department. Like when I go to hold my abdominal muscles in, they pull in much easier and faster now. I like!

In other news, we finally got the built in vacuum system and I LOVE IT! Vacuuming is so fun now!

Well, that was boring but things have been really busy here. Not so much with the blog fodder, but REAL busy! Next month will be much the same!

Enjoy the sun while it's here!

About Time Spring Got Here!

2008-04-14T21:42:00.003-07:00

Aside from the hail, that is! This past weekend was wonderful. The sun was shining, the air was sweet with blooming flowers and everyone was happy. The kids were getting along and my sanity stayed intact for once. It was a bit chilly, but a hoodie was almost enough to keep one warm. Life is good.

We FINALLY got flower boxes done up for the wrought iron window boxes on our house. We've had the empty boxes for quite some time and we finally got it done. The plants don't have flowers just yet, but will soon and since our friend who did them forgot to write down what was in them, it's like some sort of surprise party, waiting for them to flower! I'm so excited! And our house will look pretty! As long as I don't kill every last little green thing, that is. I am sadly a plant killer. The only plant that has survived in my house is the beautiful papyrus that was a house-warming gift from our former neighbours and it lives because you HAVE to overwater it. It lives in water. And it just happens to be right by the kitchen sink, where there's water.

The Hamster Boy has been quite a peach lately. And by peach I mean right F**king A**hole. Is it my imagination or is he just downright sophisticated in his backtalk? I am scratching my head. At least he comes back round to Dr. Jekyll once in awhile and demands that I "sit down, Mommy, sit down" - which is code for "I want to fondle your hair". He is growing up so fast now. Sigh. Seems like just yesterday, he was this:

Okay, Now I'm Mad!

2008-03-11T20:59:00.003-07:00

Am I destined to be tortured by Reality Television for the rest of my life? I found out within the last week or so that two of my current favourite shows - jPod and Jericho - have been cancelled. Now Jericho was kind of corny but at least there was some sort of a story line, paranoia and all. jPod was finally a Canadian program that I enjoyed and it took place in my very own city and was based on the same title book by Vancouver's Douglas Coupland. By the way, the book is slightly different but it's pretty funny. The show was hilarious! Thanks CBC for doing that to me, I appreciate it.

By now most of you know that my world revolves around television and as sad as that may sound, it's what generates my creativity. I'm not really a person who goes for a scenic hike and feels inspired to write poetry, but I can watch a quirky scene in a show or movie and think "oooh, that gives me an idea for...." Darnit all anyway!

To me reality t.v. (uh-oh she's off again) is not really reality. I believe that people feel compelled to act differently in situations or put on more emotions or add drama because they are in front of a camera. Ordinary mundane things are made out to be extra sincere, more painful, more exciting and so on. I truly believe there is a producer behind the camera egging people on for the sake of his padded pockets.

And of course, I am not totally immune to it. I still watch ANTM. I've had the sketchy experience of watching Scott Baio humiliate himself and I feel sad for him. Dude: get over yourself and grow up now. Otherwise we will be watching Scott Baio is 78 and Still Trying to Decide What to do With His Life somewhere in the future. Salt 'n'Pepa? For real? Do these has-beens really need the money so badly? How about a regular job? Try being a mail carrier in the rain or something. Oh, wait - celebrities have done that. Never mind.

Anyhoo, hopefully there will be something decent coming up in the new season. Or I'll just keep watching reruns of Law & Order, I guess.

What's new? I got to go away for a couple of days to hang out with my sister. That was nice, way too short and over all too soon. While I was away, Kestrel got her cast off and her elbow is doing quite nicely. I was surprised at how little I missed everyone! Complete sentences and thoughts were a total novelty!

Everything else is the same. Still making blankets and I have to take a bunch more photos to post on the Etsy site. Need to get some things printed up to go with them and order clothing tags for them.

That is all for now.

Update!

2008-03-09T21:13:00.007-07:00

Sorry folks, last week was a bit haywire and my computer has also been acting like a dork again. Sometimes I hate technology.

So I took Kestrel out to see Dr. Pirani on Tuesday and we surprisingly didn't have to wait very long. Believe me, I had packed like we were going to be there overnight. But we really only waited a half hour beyond our scheduled time. So the cast technologist Milt showed us in and I gave him the x-ray disc, which he set to work getting to load on the computer. Dr. Pirani came in, I gave him the lowdown including her history with Nursemaid's elbow and once the pictures finally appeared, he walked over to the screen, and immediately said "there's the fracture right there", pointing to the finest dark line you could ever see! In addition to that, he showed me the dark areas around her elbow where a hematoma was forming already to fix the break. So I think the actual break is called "subluxated supracondylar humerus fracture", apparently the most common elbow fracture for kids her age. It's right at the elbow end of the humerus (bone in your upper arm) and likely goes all the way through. Thank goodness we got that and not the exotic break! He told us to keep the cast on and come back next week for further x-rays and a cast change. Big sigh of relief! He was so gentle with Kes and most kind, too. And once again I am awed by his professionalism and knowledge. By the way, the "other"place wasn't even going to be able to see her until the 12th!! WTF?! Um, what if it wasn't fractured, but popped out and was being held in that position for TEN DAYS? I have zero faith in that hospital's orthopaedics department.

So much of the rest of the week was spent controlling my allergies and trying to get Kestrel not to run around like a psycho! She unfortunately fell today while we were out doing a bit of shopping and landed right on the cast. She cried and said it hurt her, but she was fine later. I suspected her knees and other hand hurt worse than the casted arm. Nevertheless, I shall have to mention this at our follow up on Tuesday.

I purchased the game "Guess Who?" for Kes in case we were stuck in waiting room hell, and she's been pretty stoked about playing it. I'd say she gets it right about 75% of the time. The biggest confusion for her comes from the subtle differences in hair colour and also the differences in facial hair. I can remember playing this game when I was a kid and it's been like a trip down memory lane. It's fun to pass on tradition!

I DID finally get down to some sewing and it's been baby blanket bonanza around here! I've finished four more, have five more half sewn and three more cut out. Whooo!

We Interrupt This Message...

2008-03-03T22:14:00.005-08:00

So, my happy little glowing post yesterday was brought to an abrupt halt when my five year old was injured by my two and a half year old.

I was talking on the phone when I heard Kes start to cry and say that Hayden hurt her arm. I told her to go sit in the living room and I put him in time out, which he promptly ignored. Anyway, fast forward to about fifteen minutes later when I finally hang up and I go to check on Kestrel and she says in a teary voice "how am I going to dress myself with my arm like this?" I asked her where it was hurting and she pointed to her elbow. I asked her what happened and she told me "Hayden sat on my arm and twisted it". I think "Great. Nursemaid's elbow - AGAIN." I inform hubby and we decide that I should take her to the hospital and he'll hang with Hayden.

Okay. I guesstimated three hours and we were there for three and a half. Now not all of that was waiting, but it was torture nonetheless. There were obvious infectious kids in the waiting area (can't they quarantine them?) and I was squirming in my seat every time a kid hacked or sneezed. Thank goodness they had antiseptic gel everywhere.

So we consulted with the doctor and I explained what happened and that this was, like, the fourth time. He tried to "reduce" it (as they call it) twice and she screamed her head off. I told him that it wouldn't go in the last time either and they had to x-ray, blah-de-blah-de-blah. He decides it should be x-rayed. Back to waiting room, wait some more. Get escorted to x-ray. Wait. Try to console child as she screams her head off for the x-rays (three different positions). They give her a stick-on tattoo and a bendy pencil. Back to waiting room. Get called back into room by another doctor who asks some questions, like "was the arm pulled?" I say no and at this point, Kestrel's story has now changed to "Hayden was twirling around and fell on my arm". He decides since she is kind of old for nursemaid's elbow and that it wasn't pulled that it should be casted. They can't see any fracture on the films, but tell me that doesn't mean it isn't fractured. At the very least, since it hurts so much it will be immobile. Back to waiting room while another kid gets a cast on his foot. I promise her a pink cast and cross my fingers that they have that colour. Previous kid comes out with blue so it looks promising.

Help doctor by holding her arm in position as he applies cast. Bright pink as promised! Then he tells me that he is referring us to the Orthopaedic Department. Giant alarm bell goes off. Brain goes "HELL, NO". In case you are wondering why I will never ever visit the ortho department at BC Children's again, please read this, the clubfoot saga. I leave and immediately spring into action (bit slow on the uptake that girl she is) to get an appointment with our beloved Dr. Pirani.

Most of today was spent obtaining a referral and the x-rays to take with us tomorrow when we see him. So I will be putting aside the sewing yet again to attend to this, but hopefully it can be resolved by the end of tomorrow. Plus, if she needs a different cast, I totally trust the cast technologist there - Milt rocks!

Poor muffin. She woke up crying tonight as she was in pain. We gave her some pain relief and I reassured her that it will be looked after tomorrow. Pray God it is so.

Gearing Up for Spring

2008-03-02T07:48:00.003-08:00

The days the drift by in a haze of allergy medicine and itching/sneezing fits, but in between the nose blowing and eye-rubbing, good things happen, too.

My five year old daughter requests that dad buy mom purple tulips (my favourite colour), a sweet gesture.

My son may actually toilet train himself. I am stoked. It's about time one of these kids made things easy for me. This is the same child who weaned himself, mind you - so it should not come as a surprise. My mother has already been off to the store to buy him "big boy underpants". I am going to look for Spiderman ones, too.

And I have been busy! Finally, after four years I feel that my baby blanket business is getting off the ground! I have been cutting and sewing for a couple of weeks, filling orders and producing actual stock. This was my problem in the past. I really could only make them on demand. I had no sewing room and little time to get organized. Now I have the room and more time and I am actually getting things done! In the absence of a website (I'm going to wait a bit until things really start to move, if ever), I have set up an Etsy shop. They can be purchased through the website, or if you are interested and contact me, other arrangements can be made. I definitely take special orders, they just may take a little longer.

Also, to see others I have made either as orders or as gifts, you may view my flickr site. The same ones are there as in the Etsy shop, but others too. Excuse my photography. I find that a lot of the fabric I use reflects light (therefore I cannot use the flash) and am trying to get the perfect spot in my house for taking pictures of them. So far, that is the stairs! I may have to enlist Laura's help!

Just to reiterate, here is what the Hamster Boy's blanket looks like. Hubby thinks that I am not charging enough for them, but unless celebrities start buying them, I'm leaving them as is.

Sleep and Teeth

2008-02-15T22:16:00.002-08:00

Ah...yes. Two topics I am very well acquainted with. I sleep mostly very poorly and often wonder how I journeyed from a heavy sleeper who could sleep anywhere (seriously, my mother has a photo of me around age 7 or so, fast asleep at a wedding. On the stage. With the band behind me. With my tongue hanging out.), to someone who finds sleep often very elusive. Sure, you allow for the early days of parenting and what they bring. Honestly my son has been my best sleeper, although hubby disagrees, and I've never had to "walk the floor" with him. I should hope I wouldn't have to do it now, since he's two and a half. Having kids disturb my sleep has actually had some benefits for me. For example, I can hear things and wake up instantly now. Like the time my daughter was only three weeks old and the drug-addled street person was trying to get into our house. Or the fire engines putting out the fire across the street from our house (funny, didn't hear the sirens but heard the idling engines!) There are things I wish I didn't hear though, like hubby snoring. THAT, I could definitely do without. And inevitably, it's just as I got up to tend to my son with a nightmare that he begins to snore and I can't get back to sleep and it's like five in the morning.

That brings me to my teeth. I have been a grinder for many years now and have gone through several night guards to try and calm it down. At one point I was well on my way to TMJ. My jaw would crack so loud sometimes that people would jump. Oh, and it hurt too. After some very excruciating visits to a massage therapist, who did this pressure thing inside my mouth (that hurt so bad I wanted to cry), I have had no more troubles in that area. But the grinding persisted. Often the grinding gets worse if I am under stress and I will even notice my self holding my teeth in that position during the daytime. Not good. Can anyone say tension headaches? My most recent nightguard I ended up breaking I bit down on it so hard!

Anyway, I guess the best days are the days where I wake up after a great sleep and my jaw is nice and relaxed and I am ready to face the day. I hope as time goes by that these will become the norm and all of the sleepless, tooth-grinding nights will be behind me!

The Sky Isn't Visible From Here

2008-02-15T07:55:00.004-08:00

I have the pleasure of reviewing The Sky Isn't Visible From Here by Felicia Sullivan.

I first became acquainted with Felicia when I stumbled across her blog and noticed she was asking if anyone had recent Martha Stewart Living magazines they wanted to get rid of. Oddly enough, I had been looking at my pile wondering if they would all fit into the recycling bin, so I contacted her and told her I had at least a year's worth and so I sent them to her. I noticed her upcoming book on her blog and couldn't wait for it to come out. Finally it has and I am so grateful I have had the opportunity to read it!

The autobiography details her life as a child while caring for her drug-addicted mother, who subsequently disappears not long after Felicia takes her first tentative steps into adulthood. Now, none of us has had a perfect childhood (if you have, I'd like to hear from you!), but this makes any story I could tell pale by comparison. To be a parent to your parent is something no child should have to experience and the pain throughout the book is evident. The desire for normalcy rife through the story.

And yet, there are those fleeting, shimmering moments of pure joy and happiness that occur with her mother and the love simply spills off the pages. So much so that you feel your heart ache with the need for this mom to just pull it together and be there for her daughter full-time, not just here and there. Her mother is a strong person and one might think that her strength could help her kick the habit, but the environment they live in and the men her mother chooses, just seems to perpetuate it. My feeling through the story was that it was the one thing her mom couldn't overcome. It was her Achilles' heel, if you will. And yet she seemed to love her daughter with a ferocity you might not see in others with similar circumstances.

The story ends in a beautiful tone and it is how I, were I Felicia, would choose to remember my mother.

If you read this book, expect tears, expect laughter, expect the unexpected. Please read this book.

Thanks to MotherTalk for giving the opportunity to review this great story!

You Know That Day?

2008-02-07T13:49:00.000-08:00

You know that day when:

- you wake up feeling like crap for the 37th day this year (wait that's every day this year) and think maybe if you just cut your head off, everything will be ok?
- your five year old daughter wants to argue with you about everything?
- you have an appointment and you don't want to drive to it because the parking in that area is atrocious but once you drop your son off at daycare, it's too late to run back home and get transit, so you park four blocks out of your way and pray you don't have an asthma attack walking to the building in the cold air?
- the appointment is with the ophthalmologist and they stick drops in your eyes to dilate them and then you feel nauseous for the next three hours from it because your eyes are so dilated they aren't filtering anything out?
- you've hurt your neck, but you aren't sure how and you've taken so much pain relief that you fear your liver might shut down?
- but by the time you get to the night, it's so painful that you feel you might die from that anyway, so you pop more pills?
- your teenager calls you from the school trip to Ottawa and sounds so homesick you wish you could slide through the phone to be with her?
- after you've put the kids to bed, unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher and wiped down all the surfaces, you're so tired you want to slip into a coma for real?

That was my day yesterday. Today is a little better. All I seem to do lately is complain, but the fates have conspired to make this my "sick and in pain" year. That being said, I feel that this is my year emotionally and mentally and I am going to try not to let it get me down. Try.

Oh, and on a good note, I sent "something" "somewhere" last week that may or may not earn me a rejection letter. Either way, I hope I hear from them. It will take about 9 weeks before I do, so I'm just going to put it out of my head for now.

AND...my hubby ordered me a little point and shoot camera with his Air Miles, so I can start taking pictures and movies of the kids again, without feeling totally intimidated, so YAY!

P.S. My eyes are very healthy, I just have this little thing on the eyeball that is technically "normal", so I wanted to get it checked out. It's just that when my allergies are bugging me (which is pretty much continuously right now!) I can feel it and it's like I have a grain of sand in my eye.

Slump

2008-01-31T10:42:00.000-08:00

Man, I have been in a FUNK for the last few weeks. What with being sick and allergic and irritated and tired, I just have had no energy or motivation to do anything beyond the absolute necessities. I've even fallen short on some of my regular daily activities. I hope February brings a little relief for me before the SPRING allergies kick in. I've been doped out on Benadryl for weeks now. And it sucks. I wake up in the morning with a drug hangover, zero tolerance for the kids and I drag my butt around for hours before the caffeine from my tea kicks in. Not good.

I DID consult with a local mom recently about managing hormones naturally and had a great chat with her. It is her passion and she had loads of information and great suggestions for getting things on track. It all comes down to the adrenal glands and their healthy functioning. I suspect if I can get that on track, I'll feel a whole lot better. Just gotta pick up some reading material and get some tests done first.

Anyhoo, I am still experiencing computer problems where I can no longer turn it off because it takes forever to get it to come back on again, or if it does come on, it freezes and you have to start again. Argh!

On the knitting front, many projects on the go and many planned. I am becoming more and more interested in hand-dyeing some wool and perhaps will even be thinking about spinning one day. But one obsession at a time.

I also met with a girlfriend that I used to work with and she gave me an order for FOUR of my baby blankets! Whooo! Truthfully, I haven't put much time or energy into developing this business, but I should get on that because people are interested in them and seem to really like them. Also, now that I actually have a sewing room, there is no excuse to not be doing them. Other than lack of time. Of course, if I spent less time on Ravelry, that might help!

C'est tout pour maintenant! Au revoir!

I Know, I Know

2008-01-29T07:31:00.000-08:00

Yes, I've been quiet again. Perhaps even more non-blogging than usual. But, I have a good reason, honest! My computer atteneded some sort of jackass convention and decided to quit on me. And after hubby spent $450 of his hard earned dollars getting it fixed, it's actually WORSE than before! Sometimes it takes me twenty tries to get it to just come on. I find it comical that the reason it went to the hospital in the first place was because the fan(s) died and now that it is "fixed", the only thing that comes on when you hit the power button, is...you guessed it THE FAN! (So I guess technically they fixed the problem, heh.)

Well, computer troubles aside, today it is SNOWING! And by snowing, I mean SNOWING!! Gorgeous, covered the ground and still going SNOW! Sweeeeet! I know that everyone who has to commute in it is having conniptions right now, but I am just going to look at the beautiful snow that we NEVER, EVER GET here! Yay!

Oh, and I might attend a Poetry Slam tonight.

Cranium's Got Some New Things

2008-01-23T09:24:00.000-08:00

We've all played the game Cranium right? And loved it, right? Well, now the lttle ones can have fun AND learn with some new products by Cranium.

Cranium Bloom is a new line of preschool games that are aimed at helping kids learn while they have fun. My five year old daughter Kestrel and I had the opportunity to try out a couple of their products: the Let's Go to the Zoo Seek & Find Puzzle and the Let's Play Count & Cook Game.

We started with the puzzle and it was relatively easy to assemble, with big sturdy pieces and identifiable markings. The goal is to find certain items in the puzzle and circle them with a pen. Oddly enough, the puzzle we received was slightly misprinted only on one piece, so it did not match up entirely. Nonetheless, Kestrel had a great time going through first the "beginner" booklet, finding and circling all the items easily. The nicest thing about this is that it comes with a dry erase pen and the ink comes off easily so the kids can play again and again. She moved over to the "advanced" booklet in no time, and even though she can't yet read, it was pretty easy to figure out what she was to look for. I wondered if she would get bored after a few times of playing it because she already knew where everything was, but the beauty of the five year old memory, or at least hers, is that she could remember a few and still had fun finding them again and again. I love this game and would definitely recommend it to parents.

The Count & Cook Game comes with a gameboard, dice , tokens and playing pieces, as well as a "recipe" book with real recipes. The tokens are put into slots on the gameboard. You select a recipe from the book and roll the dice. You can move your playing piece in either direction to collect the required tokens to complete the recipe. The person to put the last ingredient down is the "winner". It was a simple enough game, but a great introduction to more complex board games later on, I thought. My son fought with my daughter over the little playing pieces (cute little people in chef's hats) and they both seemed to be interested in the game for more than an average length of time. This game is an excellent way to help kids with counting, as well as introduce them to cooking. While we did not actually make any of the recipes together yet (a project we shall save for a rainy day), Kestrel gave this one the thumbs up too!

Thanks to Mom Central for giving us this opportunity to try out some fun new games!

Happy New Year?

2008-01-13T08:43:00.000-08:00

Are we already almost halfway through the first month of 2008? Is that possible? The time, she flies!

I recently got my computer back from the hospital - it was down for about a week and half and I can't say all the bugs have been fixed yet. Evidently I fried the mother board and thanks to my bloodhound nose, I quickly turned off the computer when I smelled hot plastic and managed to not lose any of my data. I have a plan in place to back up all of my stuff!

Speaking of bugs, I've been struck by another. Nothing serious and it was unavoidable, since the wee ones have been coughing and sniffling for well over a month. This one is affecting the asthma more and that is a bit of a drag because I end up feeling like a crack addict with all the Ventolin I have to take. Bah! I'm sure I'll recover nicely, though. Lots of indoors for me (oh darn, since I have about a skillion knitting projects I'm working on!) and plenty of Typhoo tea! Oh, and mom brought me back some lovely Australian tea recently. It's very creamy tasting and a nice change. Thanks, Mom!

Speaking of knitting, I've completed several projects lately and am pretty satsified with the results. A hat for each sister and a scarf for the brother-in-law. I am working on something else for my twin that's secret, but I'll post photos when the time is right. All I will say is, I have made my first foray into the world of felting and it went very well! Oh no, another addiction for me to worry about!

Speaking of photos, hubby finally bought a new, state of the art, ultra-fancy, super-de-duper camera. Of course I feel like a complete tard trying to use it. Whatever happened to point and shoot? That's my formula and it has worked well for me for many years. Ah well. Once I figure it out, I'll put photos back on here.

On the Hamster Boy front, Hayden has been a bit of a Jekyll and Hyde lately - I'm just chalking it up to illness and the fact that he is two. most of his nasty behaviour only occurs when his sisters are around, so I get the feeling that he is very possessive of me and doesn't want interference. His language is developing more and more each day, but I still find that he does not talk as much or as clearly as the girls did at this age. That's okay with me as I find I still think of him more as a bay at this point. I want his babyhood to last as long as it can, because all to soon it will be gone. That being said, I visited a friend this week who just had twin boys (she also has two girls). They were brilliantly beautiful and so tiny, even though they had decent birthweights. I held one and thought "nope, not for me anymore"! WOW! Love holding them and cuddling them, but I am so over the sleep deprivation and whatnot.

Anyway, enough of my boring news. There's way more important things going on the world, such as French matchmaking....

Oh, and I went through the pictures archives and found some Hamster Boy sweetness for you:

Theme Songs

2007-12-28T09:47:00.000-08:00

You know when a song just touches you to the core and you can't help but cry every time you hear it? The song "This Woman's Work" by Kate Bush is such a song for me. The words just pull at me and I can't explain why. You can find the song on imeem. You'll need to sign up for free to hear the whole song.

Pray God you can cope.
I stand outside this woman's work,
This woman's world.
Ooh, it's hard on the man,
Now his part is over.
Now starts the craft of the father.

I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.
I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.

I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking

Of all the things I should've said,
That I never said.
All the things we should've done,
That we never did.
All the things I should've given,
But I didn't.

Oh, darling, make it go,
Make it go away.

Give me these moments back.
Give them back to me.
Give me that little kiss.
Give me your hand.

(I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.
I know you have a little life in you yet.
I know you have a lot of strength left.)

I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking

Of all the things we should've said,
That were never said.
All the things we should've done,
That we never did.
All the things that you needed from me.
All the things that you wanted for me.
All the things that I should've given,
But I didn't.

Oh, darling, make it go away.
Just make it go away now.

Ultimately the song is about birth to me, but at the same time it could be applied to anyone going through a tough time, with the refrain "I know you've got a little life in you yet, I know you've got a lot of strength left". I'm dedicating this song to a special friend of mine. You know who you are.

Unthinkable

2007-12-17T08:21:00.000-08:00

For a parent, this is the unthinkable. Go there and give love.

The Old Boy

2007-12-14T15:33:00.000-08:00

So, one thing I forgot to mention in the last post was that when I had Hayden at the doctor, I asked her about his skin. I've had this ongoing battle with it, pretty much since he was born. I thought to begin with that the skin on his legs was bothered because he'd been in casts for so long, but it would appear this is not the only area of his body that bothers him. I've tried every cream in the book, changed to Seventh Generation baby detergent and use only half a sheet of fabric softener, or one that's already been through the dryer once. Believe me, I've been trying my darnedest to deal with this issue because he literally scratches himself to the point of bleeding. He constantly looks like he ran through a bramble bush! I had him checked previously for eczema and the doctor told me it was only contact dermatitis, but this time she agreed that it is indeed a kind of eczema and gave me a prescription for a lotion with cortisone in it. This will be about the nine millionth time he's had to have cortisone on his skin, so I'm thrilled.

Here's the deal. The first time I began applying the lotion I started coughing from the fumes and the smell of it. It smelled like something an old man or woman would wear. Sure enough, there's camphor in it. Ewwwwww! He actually kind of smells like my mother-in-law - I think she has a real fondness for camphor. So my son smells like an old guy now. Delightful! I can only hope it clears up quickly!

P.S. Sensitive skin kind of runs in our family - I tend towards dry skin and hubby sometimes wakes me up scratching. Not a pleasant sound!

Snow Candy

2007-12-05T07:01:00.000-08:00

Well, the snow has come and gone here leaving behind no evidence of its visit whatsoever. I guess we can look forward to at least a month of rain now. Nice.

Just before the rain struck and eliminated all of the wonderful white stuff, I scooped a bunch of it up, placed it in the freezer temporarily and then got to work. I melted about two cups of white sugar (that was way too much, by the way), added a little vanilla and then poured it on the snow to harden. The thing with heating white sugar until it melts is that it tends to have this slightly burned flavour to it, but I don't really mind that. Unfortunately, the "candy" also had a tinge of "Vancouver Smog" flavour to it, so I ended up chucking it all out. It was fun, though! The kids had a blast in the snow while it lasted. They got all geared up (I was exhausted by the time they went out the door) and played for quite some time out there. It's nice to see them get some great activity outdoors.

While it was still snowing, I was sitting in the living room and started noticing this odd noise out the front of my house. I thought someone was on the front deck, so I looked out the window and lo and behold! Our neighbour was busy shovelling off our steps! We truly have moved into the twilight zone here! In our old neighbourhood, a scary drug addict came to the door asking for money to shovel our walk. I do give him credit for wanting to actually do something for the money, but I wasn't about to support his disease, so I sent him away. Things like that were a daily occurrence for us there. We can't believe how different it is and how un-stressed we are now. Later our neighbour took Kes along with his daughter (who is in her class) and his son over to toboggan at a nearby park. How much do you love a neighbour like that?

It's been a little while since I posted and I wanted to share something that happened to me. Just over a week ago, I had this very strange "attack" on my system. It was late at night and I had been laying on the couch, drowsing. I'd had a couple of drinks, but was by no means drunk. I got up to go to bed and brushed my teeth, etc. When I rounded the corner to my room I suddenly got this very tight feeling in my chest, couldn't breathe and my arms went numb to my elbows. I instinctually started to breathe slow, deep breaths (one of the times that being asthmatic actually came in handy because I am so practiced at it), found my husband and sat with him for around ten minutes until it began to pass. We thought perhaps it was a physiological event, where I was maybe slightly dehydrated and then standing up to quickly made all the blood rush down from my head. I have fairly low blood pressure and tend to get head rushes all the time when I stand up. While it was happening, I was quite scared and thought the word "ambulance" more than once. It was hard not to panic and took quite a lot of effort to keep my breathing slow, rather than giving in to hyperventilating.

Research showed up a few things. The thing about the internet is it can give you too much information that may or may not be correct. All of the symptoms I had matched the criteria for angina or a heart malfunction as well as a panic attack. I knew it was neither because a) I was not having pain in my heart or on that side, I was only slightly numb and b) the cognitive part was missing for anxiety or panic. I am quite the opposite since hubby and I have been more in love than ever and therefore happy. Laura suggested it was heartburn because she said she had something similar happen to her once. This made some sense to me since I have been having a lot of digestion problems lately. But looking around on the internet did not turn up these symptoms in association with heartburn. Unfortunately, I was so freaked by the event that my anxiety was high for the next few days and I kept feeling like it might happen again. Curse my overactive brain!

I had to see my doctor yesterday to get a flu shot, so I asked her about it. Turns out that Laura was correct. Or at least close. It wasn't heartburn, but in fact an esophageal spasm. Apparently the acid rises suddenly to the esophagus and it seizes up, causing all of the symptoms I had! So the combination of alcohol with a caffeinated/carbonated drink and my current reflux problems made this all happen. Phew! Thanks Dr. Laura! I shall be taking a stronger antacid now to prevent that from ever happening again. Oh, and if that is what a panic attack feels like minus the mental panic? I NEVER want to experience that EVER!

So I got my flu shot and Hamster Boy was due for some vaccinations as well. Or should I say overdue. He's always been behind because of the whole casts on his legs for seven months thing, but we are now officially caught up! I thought that he needed one more vax and was thinking I'd toture him with the chicken pox vax since Kes just got that one too. Ahem. He needed two more shots and our doctor suggested the flu shot as well, so we skipped the chicken pox one for now and I'll get it done sometime before he goes to preschool. The first shot went well and he barely noticed it. The second one he started screaming "owie! owie!" and pummeled our doctor's stomach with his feet (sorry Sylvia!). By the third one he was hysterical and she barely got it in. That one bled because I was trying to control all of his limbs at once and he was kicking so hard that the needle moved sideways slightly. I am so glad he is the last of my kids. Really.
Poor guy is limping today on that leg.

Here's some yumminess:

I Shouldn't Be Blogging Today

2007-11-25T08:12:00.000-08:00

I am in the worst mood. My day is hideous so far and it's only just after 8 am. It's probably all the fault of a little someone with the initials P, M and S. I am feeling much like going on a murderous rampage. Hide the axes.

The last week or so has been pretty fine, I guess. Nothing major to report. Actually there are a couple of things. On Monday, November 19th, Kestrel woke up on her fifth birthday and announced that since she was five, she was now going to throw out her "uggies" (soothers). In fact, once we got downstairs, she handed them to me and requested I chuck them out. I complied, expecting immediate regrets, but there were none. In fact, even though she mentioned them a few times over the next day or two, there were no tears, there was no whining and there was no asking for them back (good thing because I did NOT want to go garbage can diving!) She's been promised a pretty special present if she lasts a week, which is tomorrow. I think she is going to make it!

Remember when Hayden smashed his front teeth? About two weeks ago I had looked at the displaced tooth and thought to myself "well, it looks like it's going to stay there". That was okay with me because at least he HAD the tooth. A couple of days ago I was changing his diaper and he was giggling at me for some reason and I realize that the tooth is back where it should be! It is almost exactly back to normal! Yippee!! I was so excited I had to phone my hubby and tell him. Give it up for the human body! We really ARE regenerating miracles aren't we? I guess that was why he'd been so miserable for a few weeks - maybe the tooth was repositioning itself and it was bothering him?

The last bit of news is that I converted Hayden's crib to the toddler bed. This is a bit earlier than I might have done it ordinarily (I wanted to say for Kes, but she never slept in the stupid crib), but I am so fed up with being "paged" to get him out in the morning that I thought I would just make it easier for him and me. We are on day four and each night he has gotten out of the bed about three times and then settled down. Interestingly, when I've put him into it for his nap, he has stayed there?!?! That kid is weird.

I've got several knitting projects on the go right now, but I finished my snowflakes. I think they turned out GREAT! Have a look:

I also made these guys from the Mochimochi Blog. They're blades of grass and I named them after shades of green: Jade, Olive, Fern and Myrtle (if you don't believe me, check Wikipedia):

How Old Am I?

2007-11-15T22:15:00.000-08:00

Man, I'm starting to feel 79, not 39! Something dire has happened to my back and it's one of those things where a nerve is being pinched, so everytime I make a move or take a deep breath it grabs. It's painful, but annoying moreso. There's a certain dull pain that I can tolerate, but each time I make specific natural body movements, I find myself suddenly speaking Pirate:

"Argh!"
"Urgh!"
"Har!"
"A-Hoyyyyy!"

My son thinks it is hysterical and no matter how much I try to explain that "Mommy has an owie", he still jumps on me and giggles when I wheeze out air in interesting vocal patterns.

At least it is better today than it was yesterday.

Oh, and it seems to have occurred when I hoisted Ten Ton Tommy out of his crib yesterday morning. Well with all the strikes we've been enduring or hearing about (believe me the writer's strike is way worse in my world than the garbage strike we had), it makes sense that my back would jump on the bandwagon, or at least hobble over to it and gingerly perch there.

I'm off to find appropriate drugs and conk out. 'Night all!

I Knew It!

2007-11-14T09:18:00.000-08:00

You Should Be A Poet

You craft words well, in creative and unexpected ways.
And you have a great talent for evoking beautiful imagery...
Or describing the most intense heartbreak ever.
You're already naturally a poet, even if you've never written a poem.

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

And isn't it ironic that I should take this quiz just after I was recently introduced to this very cool thing called "Poetry Slam"? What's that you say? Well the best description I can come up with is Extreme Poetry Reading. That is to say, envision Jack Kerouac or some such Beat Poet performing his work on stage, but add some extra oomph. AND...the best news about this is that British Columbia has it's very own expert at this. His name is Shane Koyczan and I have to say that I really have never felt as moved by poetry in general as I have by his. THIS is the guy that will preserve a dying artform and perhaps make future generations realize that poetry isn't for losers. I know people that "hate" poetry. I don't really know how you can hate poetry. After all, haven't you purchased a greeting card before with some nice words arranged poetically? And what made you choose that particular one? Probably the poem - even if it was a naughty limerick.

Poetry has always been my thing and I have written tons of it. It is the thing I turn to when I really want to write, but don't have the time for sitting down and setting out a story on the page. But it can tell a story itself. It can teach a lesson. Admittedly most of my poetry rhymes, mostly because I find it a challenge - to make something make sense at same time as it rhymes. But I've started experimenting a little with other kinds of poetry and am pleased with the results. I am going to share a recent one with you; it's style was inspired by the late great e.e.cummings. But before that, you should really watch Shane in action. It will move you, I guarantee it!

Hoo, I get chills and tears at the same time!

Now here is mine. I wrote it after a recent family loss.

I Give You a Piece of My Heart

Cupped here in my hands
A splinter, a fragment, a mote
The smallest grain of sand
A piece of my heart for your heart
(My heart to your heart)

I don't need it, not this piece
The one granule of my heart that doesn't grieve
Place it in that pinpoint hole
So that one tiny portion of you won't hurt
(I'll take the pain)

It will be oh so fleeting
But during the frozen moments of the day
You'll stop the pain
Just for a microsecond I'd say
(Breathe it in and hold it)

Once you activate it enough
It will begin to grow
Not so quickly
It'll be downright slow
(Painstaking yet thorough)

In time the heal and hurt will reverse
Only a pinprick will cause you pain
That one will be there to stay
But the sting will be less than it is today
(For a lifetime to keep)

That will be my heart
Beating inside your heart
Enveloping the throb of sorrow
While you make a new start
(I give you a piece of my heart)

That segment will remain
A mneme for you to keep
Gone but not forgotten
To carry with you forever
(But I'll take the pain)

I'm Still Here!

2007-11-10T11:52:00.000-08:00

Aggh! Is it really THAT long since I last posted? Man, where does the time go?

To be honest with you, I haven't really had a lot to say. Life has been good, the kids are fine and hubby is happy and healthy, as am I for the most part. My asthma was acting up a bit when the weather couldn't decide what to do with itself, but it has levelled out again.

I've been scratching my head a little trying to decide what to do with this blog. When I started it, it was to chronicle Hayden's journey through clubfoot and it was a good place for me to vent my frustrations and celebrate the triumphs. I've found over time that it has morphed into being more and more about me, and less about Mr. Hamster. Truthfully, his ongoing journey reached a plateau a few months ago. What does that mean? That nothing bad is happening, but nothing more good is going to happen because his feet are the best they can be at this point. My job right now is to monitor and maintain. If I keep my stringent schedule with his boots and bar, he should sail through this without further issues.

I enjoy writing here, but I find I get busy and time goes by and I don't put anything here. I suppose that is okay because if I ain't got somethin' to say, I ain't got somethin' to say! I am not going to put just anything here for the sake of having a post that day. Combine that with the fact that the kids are getting older and I need to consider their privacy a bit more, and the fact that my husband has a certain level of discomfort over me sharing much of anything about the kids here and I find myself heading in a different direction. The blog has become largely about me and my feelings and what I am doing.

So bear with me as I decide what to do. I don't want to stop this blog, but I may tailor it to suit my needs a bit better. I also want to focus a bit more on my knitting blog which you can get to through my profile. I am on an all time creative high right now and am knitting more things than I have ever knitted before and I want to start recording what I am doing. That's the beauty of the internet - you can find a pattern for anything and have it made before you blink! I love it!

I'll try and be back soon!

When I Was Pregnant

2007-10-24T15:50:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant the first time, I was young and, well, dumb. I was very excited about the whole idea of growing life in my body and what that meant to me as a woman. I was prepared for birth and was determined to do things as naturally as possible. What I wasn't prepared for was my marriage evaporating completely one month before my daughter was born. You wanna talk stress? It's a wonder she wasn't premature. I cried a lot. I prayed for her to come so I could be distracted from the pain in my heart. Well the blessed day came soon enough and with relatively few interventions (some laughing gas and an episiotomy), my nine pound, three ounce daughter made her way into this mortal coil. And having a newborn DID serve as a distraction, but it brought with it all the usual stuff that you hear moms complain about in addition to being a single parent. Luckily for me, I had moved in with my parents and younger siblings and had immense support.

The second time around was much different. I was even more prepared for this pregnancy and birth gig and as a bonus, had a willing partner there to hold my hand. The pregnancy was not overly pleasant in terms of my health (I suffered from terrible allergies and prenatal rhinitis), but I planned and dreamed about my perfect home birth, selected wonderful midwives and happily knit tiny things. Then the bomb dropped. The baby was breech and if it didn't turn around, it would be c-section city. It was recommended to me, after trying everything in the book to turn it around including two very painful external versions, that I book a c-section and be done with it. Hell, NO was my response to that. I stuck to my guns, convinced she would turn herself around at the last moment. Sadly that never happened and about 29 interventions later I was delivered of a seven pound, four ounce baby girl. My early bonding with her is sketchy in my memory. I remember being in recovery and the midwife asking if I wanted to nurse her. Whacked out on a pile of drugs (and entirely distracted by the fact that I was parched and no one would give me a drink of water) I agreed and she brought the baby to me. The baby and I looked at each other like "yeah right". The next few weeks were incredibly difficult for me as I tried to heal, not only from the c-section incision, but the additional six inch tear the surgeon had accidentally put in my uterus during the delivery, AND look after a newborn infant at the same time when all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball (had I been able to) and cry for my mother. I try not to think too much about that because my daughter was born healthy and is now a thriving five year old.

It was recommended to me that I have a c-section for any subsequent babies due to the tear. It placed me at risk for a uterine rupture, but there again I stood my ground. I know my body and how it heals and I felt that I had to at least try another natural delivery, if for no other reason than to alleviate some of the trauma I had felt from the c-section. On the midwives' recommendation, my husband and I consulted with an obstetrician who gave us the go ahead to try, but suggested we have a safety plan in place, ie. epidural. Physically, the pregnancy itself was uneventful and I felt very beautiful. Turns out the old wives' tales are right - you ARE way more beautiful when you are carrying a boy, if only in your own mind! Finding out I was carrying a boy was a bit of a surprise as I expected another girl, but eventually I wrapped my head around it and tried to think of a name. This pregnancy brought some additional surprises for me, such as intense rage and antenatal depression. I had already been seeing a therapist to deal with the whole c-section trauma thing, so I was glad I had her to rely on for extra support.

This being my third pregnancy, I thought that there wasn't anything I couldn't handle and was pleased to be able to "relax" (ha) this time around because I was a seasoned mother. This was going to be easy, I thought. But nature fooled me yet again and my son was born with bilateral clubfoot (you can read his journey here). Now in addition to sleep deprivation, late night feedings and dirty diapers, I had weekly trips to the hospital for casts to deal with. Easy? HA!

What I have taken away from this, and perhaps I am just a tad slow on the uptake, is that pregnancy (and ultimately life) is totally unpredictable. You can plan everything down the nth degree, but there will still be things that come up and surprise you. If you are pregnant, my suggestion would be to dedicate a portion of your planning to "expecting the unexpected" and what your reaction might be to whatever comes your way. It will enhance your experience and help you bond more quickly with your baby.

P.S. My nine pound son was born the regular way, but with the assistance of an epidural. I had decided that third time around had earned me the right to be a wuss. I'm glad I went that route and it helped me make decisions about his deformity in a clear way and not a drug-induced fog and loads of pain.

I'm So Bad at This

2007-10-22T22:22:00.000-07:00

Inspired by several people, I've been pulling out some old writing and reviewing it for potential movement forward. And...it bites. I have all the ideas in the world and can't seem to translate them to the page. Do I need to take a course or something? I found one piece of work that I had obviously worked pretty hard on as it was up to 46 pages and over 13,000 words, but it was boring as hell. It was intended as kidlit and had I been an eleven year old, I would have burned it. I'm so much better at channeling my creativity into physical gifts that I can give to people. The knitting, for example. I can create things in relatively short order that people like. My baby blankets are another example and it would be nice to get that off the ground one day - that whole business. Hello, web page? (Something I know nothing about) Oh, and in case you're wondering what they're all about, have a look at the one in this picture that I made especially for Hamster Boy.

Okay, you can say it: "awwwwwwwww...!"

The blanket is made with some GORGEOUS Toile de Jouy that I imported from France and some lovely butter yellow terry cloth on the back (which you can't see). To date, it's my favourite blanket for him. I'm not sure he feels quite the same way, but he'll see my side one day! Sadly, the website where I was ordering the fabric has stopped selling it and is strictly a quilting site now. Boo. On the upside, it might mean a little shopping trip to "La Belle Pays", country of my heart, La France! In the meantime, I've got some of the fabric left in a variety of colours, so email me if you are interested!

I received my tiny, tiny knitting needles today that came all the way from England and boy are they tiny!

I can make cards until the cows come home, but can't seem to get coherent sentences onto a page. Argh!

I shall persist, but SOMETHING has to change!

Trivial Pursuit

2007-10-20T08:27:00.000-07:00

On the subject of completely trivial topics and your need to know them, I've been wondering for some time what the coins were called that accompanied the Euro. I had never heard anyone refer to them before and, well quite frankly it had been puzzling me off and on. I mean here we have pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, loonies and toonies (which I think should be twonies, but it looks funny) - all ultimately referred to as "cents". The UK has the penny and 2, 5, 10, 20, and 50 pence pieces as well as one and two pound coins (also called, I believe, "quid"). France had the centimes (formerly "sou") and the francs (which could be coin or paper). Uganda has cents and the shilling and it goes on.

Consult the Great Oracle Google.

Apparently they are called "cents" and that includes 1, 2, 5, 10, 20 and 50 cent coins. There are also 1 and 2 Euro coins. Aren't they pretty? They pretty much look like Canadian coins, with the exception of the 2, 20 and 50 cent coins, which we don't have. I have to say that the 2 Euro coins resembles the toonie an awful lot.

So there you have it - completely unsolicited trivia that may or may not be important to you ever.

On a side note, I finally got around to trying the bleach kit my dentist gave me for my teeth two years ago. I couldn't use it for awhile because I was either pregnant or breastfeeding and I admit I was worried that it might taste yucky. That can be a big deterrant for me. BUT...I am VERY pleased with the preliminary results I have to say. My teeth looked considerably whiter this morning. I could make out tiny fracture lines in my teeth though, which was a negative. I'll keep the world aprised ('cuz I know you all care!)

Gloom

2007-10-19T15:36:00.000-07:00

You know those days you can have? You know the ones. The ones where you wake up feeling old and cranky. Looking in the mirror only confirms it; you're greying, wrinkling, sagging and flabby. And to make things even better, you have a raging headache that laughs at the Tylenol 1/Motrin combo you've chosen to attack it with.

That pretty much describes my week so far. I've been struck by a case of the blahs and while I know they'll pass, it's hard to be patient about it. Adding to that the fact that I've been dealing with said headache all day so far, have a "thing" (for lack of a better word) in my right eye that is irritating the CRAP out of it and also have some sort of lump/bruise on the bottom of my left foot and I'm a walking disaster! I've been completely uninspired to do anything, even knit - which indicates how dire this week has been. The weather isn't helping much either - one minute it's sunny, the next it's freezing and rainy. My asthma doesn't know what to do with itself except torment me, so I'm walking around like some sort of decaying, wheezy old woman.

I think I might just go to bed and start over tomorrow! Yeah, there's a plan!

Or drink heavily.

Hello Again!

2007-10-13T07:35:00.001-07:00

Man, I've been a lazy blogger lately. Well, actually a busy one.

First of all, I got totally caught up in a certain project which pleased me to no end. I honestly didn't want it to end, but I was starting to get a tad kooky with the ideas I was dreaming up and I had promised the recipient I was sending it soon. I'm happy to say that Persephone was extremely well received and even earned a little fame. My favourite thing about Persephone? Well, aside from he stunning pink hair and her skull bag, I'd have to say her miniature copy of Blackbringer, complete with the first chapter. I also got a real kick out of knitting the tiny skull, flower for her shirt and the heart tattoo for her behind (see picture below)! I had to use really small knitting needles for those and have been inspired to go even smaller and have ordered some 0.5mm needles from my favourite website in England, called Buttercup Miniatures.

In addition to that, hubby and I managed to get away for five glorious kid-free days to Montreal. It was hubby's 30 year high school reunion and I had a total hoot! (of course I had to ask the DJ at the banquet to make sure he played something for the one 80s child in the room!) We also got in some quality visits with his parents and some close friends of ours. My mother, brave woman that she is, willingly looked after my spawn and naturally they were almost complete angels for her, sleeping in, eating everything she served them (except mysteriously Hayden has gone off potatoes in any form but French fry) and generally behaving. Of course, Mom was happy that the noise level was going to go down in her house and her dogs were even happier to see the back end of Hayden who never stopped following them around! When we arrived to pick the kids up, I got the BEST reception from Hayden. He wouldn't stop hugging me, putting his hands on my face and fondling my hair. And yes, I begrudgingly admit that I missed the hair twiddling. I have to say that I missed him the most out of the three, partly because he is the youngest and has never been away from me for that long and also because the girls are very independent and I knew they would be fine. But I only missed him at brief moments during the trip. When people at the reunion found out this was out first time away from all three kids for more than a day, they asked if I was worried or nervous. I merely informed them that my mother has six children, and no.

Fall is upon us and the trees are turning, the air is cool and it's time to start pulling out the gloves and hats. Probably the umbrellas too, but we won't go there. After twelve weeks of nasty garbage hell, it looks like the sanitation strike might be over with. I think the final vote is tomorrow. It was starting to look like it would go until January, so the city was hyperventilating a lot. Let's hope they can achieve something productive tomorrow, after having turned down TWELVE previous offers!! We're tired of the stench already! (Not to mention the fruit flies)

Here is the promised photo (click on it to get a bigger view)(thanks to Laura for her photography):

A Song

2007-10-02T08:02:00.001-07:00

For this to actually be even remotely funny, you need to know the tune to The Neverending Story. Otherwise, it won't really make much sense. This is my homage to Limahl. Here we go:

There's a mound
Taller than a tree
On my bed
Of unfolded laundry

Make believe I'm elsewhere
Hiding out of sight
Please somebody help me
With an answer to my
Neverending Laundry
(Ah...)

Reach for pants
And fold them so neatly
Dream a dream
Perhaps there's a fairy

Two year old behind me
He unfolds what I have done
There has to be somebody
With an answer to my
Neverending Laundry
(Ah...)

There's no hope
That it will go away
My back is sloped
From hunching o'er this way

Kleenex in a pocket
Pennies left behind
Wish there was more money
I keep all that I find
For doing laundry
(Ah...)
The Neverending Laundry
(Ah...)
Repeat and fade

Don't Call Me

2007-09-24T08:33:00.001-07:00

Basically, after about 5pm today, don't call. It's the sesaon premiere of everything and I have taken great pains to make it so I can watch all of it (my thumb is actually sore from bookmarking everything on my digital cable). You may not hear from me all week, actually, since everything is starting up. The kids will get shoved into bed around 5, whether they need to be there or not, and I will be curled up on the couch with a hot water bottle for my poor owie back and perhaps some popcorn (if I feel like picking out of my teeth later).

Tell people to shove food under the door, okay? Here's some photo love for you:

A Meme

2007-09-21T17:10:00.000-07:00

I got this meme from over at Procrastamom's House (blog, whatev) and thought I'd give it a try!

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Rusty Quest

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Coconut Lassy Mog

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
H-Coh

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Purple Hamster

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Annette Vancouver

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Coh-He

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink put “The”)
The Silver Stella Artois

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
Harry Alan

9. STRIPPER NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne, favorite candy)
Theorema Hot Tamale (snicker!)

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )
Carolyn Alan(my mom doesn't have a middle name, so I used her first name)

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Tait Tokyo

12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Autumn Lily

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”)
Nectarine Hoodie

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),
Air Cherry

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The Knitting Snowstorm Tour

Heeee!

On Borrowed Wings

2007-09-18T09:28:00.001-07:00

On Borrowed Wings is a novel by Chandra Prasad. The novel contains deceipt and subterfuge, but it is not a crime or mystery story.

The story details the ordinary life of a young woman in America during the Depression with future prospects being nothing more than marriage, children and small town life. An unexpected tragedy offers her a larger opportunity to make something of herself, with one catch; she must pose as a male. The story consists of her trying to fit in and find her way, all without being discovered.

To be honest with you, I found this book a slightly difficult read. There was a rather gloomy undertone that kept me feeling uncomfortable, however I did have to remind myself of the time it was portraying, which was not a happy time. And perhaps the discomfort came from knowing how difficult it would be to hide such a huge secret and the anxiety that it would create in one's daily life. Knowing how hard things were for women during those days, you come to have a deep respect for the main character and her perseverance. She makes several differences in some lives and at the expense of losing what's left of her family, she carves out a future for herself.

Overall, I enjoyed the book even though it did not have me fully captivated all of the time. I think that Chandra Prasad has achieved the goal of "girls are just as good as boys", whether that was her intent or not. Most of us are familiar with the story of Yentl and how far that deception had to go. This is not a theme that you find often in fiction and I appreciate the author for tackling it. I would recommend this novel and I look forward to reading more by Ms. Prasad.

BOB Books

2007-09-11T07:48:00.000-07:00

I was given the opportunity to review a set of BOB Books by Bobby Lynn Maslen (published by Scholastic), little books that are designed to help kids learn to read.

Do you remember the first book you learned to read? I do. I remember because it was such a revelation to me that I could look at the words and they suddenly meant something to me. The book that I learned to read was called "Adventures with Mac". I'm not sure if it was the first line, but I clearly remember that one of the pages simply said "Mac the rat". Reading has always been my first love.

BOB Books could very well have the same impact on a child. They are short, small in size (therefore easy to hold) and there are never more than three or four words on a page. As my daughter is a pre-reader (she just started Kindergarten last week), these are the perfect books for her to try and start reading. So far, she knows all of the letters of the alphabet and the sounds they make. Our school encourages and promotes early literacy, so I imagine she will be reading very quickly. Having a tool like this at home will definitely be an asset. I am excited for her to be able to learn with Mat and Sam and the rest of the troupe!

Esthetically, the books are appealing. The pictures are simple line drawings and depict what is happening in the story. The characters are quite cute (drawn by John Maslen) and the stories have comedic value (Sam sits on Mat). We haven't read through all of them, but I am sure we will be doing so very shortly! My two year old son has also taken an interest in them, which is nice!

All in all, I'd recommend these cute little books for early readers!

What's with the Weather?

2007-09-08T08:12:00.000-07:00

I've had to break out the knee socks and my warmer sweater. This is my favourite time of year, as I think I've mentioned once or a million times. Unfortunately, it's that exact time of year when you don't know how to dress to go out because the weather can end up being anything. If you're smart, you'll dress in layers so you can peel them off or put them back on. So confusing! As much as I hate the endless rain we get here, we keep getting teased into thinking it's not coming. And then one day it will just start and not stop. Okay, there's my season rant for the year.

My brother and SIL are doing as well as can be expected during this difficult time. My feeling is that we need to get them past that critical due date and then the true healing journey can begin. Even then, time will be measured in terms of "what might have been" for a long time. Our family operates this way. We think something into oblivion because this is how we integrate bad experiences. Speaking from experience, it has often taken me YEARS to work through something and I've never been through something as hard as this. All I know is the adage is true: "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger". It also makes us more compassionate, more understanding and maybe even more long-suffering. I know they will take as much time as is necessary to grieve together and comfort one another and thank goodness they have that. They are smart people. They won't rush the process and I hope they can take as much time as possible from outside obligations. I'm thinking about them every day and I want them to know that I would go to the lengths of the earth to help them. {INSERT GIGANTIC HUG HERE}

(Shhh....don't tell them...I'm working on a little project for them and I have to use the old lady magnifying glass that hangs around my neck to do it!)

The first week of school went just well with the only problem with Kes being that she does NOT want to leave the after school portion of her day and gets quite irate. One of the days she cried half of the way home. So I don't think we're going to have any "I don't want to go to school" issues! It's nice to be able to plan a day out and not juggle it around having two kids home.

As per usual, I am trying to do too many projects at once. And my brain hates that I can't do them all together. At the same time. I'd get SO much more accomplished that way! Argh! Why was I cursed with this creatively hyperactive brain? I never complete anything because I'm always working on too many things. I can't order them into a list of importance because they are all important. Argh.

Sadness

2007-09-05T14:17:00.000-07:00

On Monday morning, very early, my youngest brother and his wife lost their very first baby at 33 weeks gestation due to a placenta abruption. The baby, a boy, had to be delivered via c-section. Mama is being very stoic, but my brother is not doing very well.

They've been reassured that there was absolutely nothing they could have done to prevent it, nothing that they did or did not do caused it and that it will NOT happen again. I believe they will try again very soon and I hope they do. They won't replace their sweet little boy, but babies have a way of healing you in the best way.

The family has rallied around them and they are very loved and supported, but we will also respectfully let them grieve in their own way. There are no words to say, no gestures you can make to even remotely make this better.

All I am doing right now is sending thoughts of love and healing their way.

Lost in Translation

2007-09-01T08:06:00.001-07:00

Both of my daughters began talking at an early age, with first words being around 9 and 10 months respectively. The boy took a lot longer in my opinion, but certainly didn't fall outside "the norm". Right now, his speech is a mixture of gibberish and totally clear statements. He also has some quirky words and phrases that I love and admittedly don't try to change just yet. Gimme a break, he's my last baby and I want to keep him that way! While his slightly older sister (who starts Kindergarten on Tuesday - yahoo!) speaks perfectly clearly, she has some pretty funny replacement words that make me wonder if she just doesn't hear them properly. A couple that I can call to mind right now are:

She calls the fast food restaurant A&W, "Alien and W"
While away in Tofino, she was calling the anemones that we found "sea enemies"

But Hayden has some good ones too. In the mornings, he'll say to me "I want offa shoes on", which means "take off this stupid orthopaedic brace!" He has a plastic toy wolf and donkey and he calls them his "rain-dogs" - occasionally he actually will say "reindeer" - either way it is funny! If he actually uses the word "donkey", he means "doughnut" (it comes out more like "done-key" - but we laugh at the irony of it since he has the above toy. "Mighty Machines" and "medicine" both sound like "my shee-sheen", but with a subtle difference that only I can detect. He calls my mom "Nina" (all the other grands call her "Nanny") and my dad "Gumpa" (all the others call him "Grandad"). He has some pretty normal pronunciations of things, where the letter k is replaced with a t (kitty=titty, Kessie=Tessie), etc.

Every once in awhile he'll surprise me and come out with a sentence that is clear as a bell. For example while we were away, he had to sleep in the same bed as us (it was torture and I don't even want to talk about it) and one morning he head-butted me in the face and said into my ear "MOM WAKE UP, I'M HUNGRY!"

All in all I'd say his speech is right on track and there is only the odd time where he says something that I just cannot translate and he gets very frustrated with me.

In other news, Kestrel starts Kindergarten next week (as mentioned above) and she is pretty stoked. It's the end of another era in my life and also hers. She will now be in the clutches of the school system and everything that I say will have no value against what the teacher says. not that that isn't happening already tho'. I hope things get more normal around here now that school is back on track.

Oh, and we still have a garbage strike on here with no other community services. Nice. I guess it's a good thing that I don't frequent the library and would rather buy books instead!

Maximum Ride: Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

2007-08-28T09:30:00.000-07:00

I have been given the honour and pleasure of reviewing the above book, a fiction novel for young adults.

Maximum Ride: Saving the World, etc. is the third book in a series about young "mutant" teenagers who can fly (a result of avian DNA) who are being hunted down and are slated for "retirement" by their creator and nemesis "The Director". (Shades of Dark Angel, the series which had me interested right away). They are continually chased by and engaged in combat with "Flyboys" (also known as Erasers) throughout the novel, which makes for some pretty intense fight scenes. The flock does not always escape unscathed and are captured once or twice, but usually manage to prevail under the direction of their leader Max and her "co-pilot" Fang.

Without having read the first two novels, I found it relatively easy to slide into the story and figure out most of what was going on. I appreciated the fact that James Patterson, the author (Along Came a Spider and Kiss the Girls), did not retell the previous stories. There were allusions to earlier events, which left me wondering a bit, but it has motivated me to buy the first two books and catch up. There were no significant references that were too complex to figure out.

Another appealing factor for me was the short chapters. It kept you interested and wanting more, especially since the narrative changed from first person Max to third person Fang, almost from chapter to chapter. It was two stories being told simultaneously that were the same, yet different. I think this style would appeal to young readers as you have two perspectives of the same events for the most part.

Throughout the book, realizations are made by the characters, some very surprising and rewarding, while an underlying theme about saving the environment and ultimately the earth is threaded through. I did not find it to be preachy or sanctimonious and the message was clear: kids need to take an active part in keeping this earth liveable.

Though the characters are all children, aged fourteen and under, the language was quite adult and there were some slightly adult themes (such as the characters having to deal with children dying and being hurt). This indicates to me that James Patterson feels his readers can handle this sort of thing, more than we adults perhaps give them credit for. It's a glimpse into the "real world" if you will. The message is also there that adults can make (big) mistakes.

I enjoyed the random blog entries and was grateful for the fact that it was not a permanent writing style for the story. Speaking from an adult perspective, this kind of format can become tedious, but interspersed as it was, it helped the story along considerably and provided variety for the reader.

All in all, the story was entertaining, exciting and kept me captivated until the end. A good read that I will recommend to the young (and old) people in my life.

Ick

2007-08-18T14:58:00.000-07:00

So a nasty coldsore erupted on my mouth in the middle of the night, so I didn't even have a chance at combatting it before it appeared. Ew. I feel like there is a tumour on my face and my friend suggested a burkha to cover my disfigurement. I may just go that route. It was threatening to wander further along the mouth line, so I threw down the gloves, got a prescription and have now waged war. It better be gone by tomorrow.

Nothing really super new to report. I might have the opportunity to go to Iowa for a symposium on clubfoot next month and it is merely a matter of paying for the flight and hotel, paying for the conference, getting the kids organized, renewing my passport and convincing my husband that it would be a good thing.

I got some vaccinations in preparation for my trip to Uganda next year and I have felt a bit yucky from them. Ah well - I'm sure if I got Polio and Hepatitis I'd feel yuckier, right?

How I Became A Yummy Slummy Mummy

2007-08-14T21:08:00.000-07:00

There's a little book competition going on over here and me being one to never turn down a free book am going to try and win one!

So once upon a time I was a young girl with dreams of being a mother. Oh, I would have six children and I would never, ever make the same mistakes my mother made. (I mistook those for mistakes at the time) My children would all be happy, healthy, friendly, polite, respectful little specimens and there would be three boys and three girls, born in alternating gender order, starting with a boy. My reasoning on this was that everyone should have an older brother. I thought this was smart until I actually got an older (step) brother and then realized boys are stupid.

So the time came when I got married at the ripe old age of almost twenty and two years later I was nine months pregnant, abandoned by my cheatin' husband and moving back in with my parents. And things just went from bad to worse for awhile in my personal life. The good part was that I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy, BIG baby girl and I was thrilled. I'm not sure I would have had the same reaction to a son.

Fast forward to now where that baby is now 16 and she has two sibling bookends who are four and a half and two years old. I'm happy to report that I have stopped at three instead of my intended six offspring (and the boy came last). Not surprisingly my parenting hasn't gone exactly the way I planned. most mornings consist of me dragging my sorry self downstairs before 7:00am with at least one small person in tow, bleary eyed and resentful. Usually the middle child follows and begins to pester me for foodstuffs when I am barely coherent and just want to throw on the television and pass out while they leave me alone. Wishful thinking on my part. Usually there is screaming within 7 minutes of everyone being downstairs.

So what makes me a Yummy Mummy? Well, I clean up very well. I consider myself for the most part to be a loyal friend and a good listener. I accommodate my husband for "special us time" as often as possible. I can bake some mean cookies and my scrambled eggs are superior. I am equally comfortable dining at a classy restaurant as I am at a sidewalk hot dog vendor's. I can sew, knit, papercraft and have a great imagination for creating things. Give me an idea and watch me go with it. I love to read and have good conversations with people. A friend once described me as the person she would call if she was ever on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? ~ I have oodles of trivia stacked in my brain.

But then there is my Slummy Mummy side. I don't know how to make coffee. I loathe housework and generally follow the Loonette the Clown method of cleaning ~ "The Ten Second Tidy". I will refuse to let my children eat cookies, cake, anything treat-like in the mornings, but will then give them each a Poptart (What? That's breakfast right?). I can spend hours on my computer, only stopping long enough to throw food at the seagulls....er...kids and get them down for naps, etc. I will hide candy from my family so I can eat it all myself. Sometimes I have been known to belch (politely, of course).

So am I yummy or slummy? Somedays I feel more yummy than slummy; somedays it's the other way around. You can always come over and be the judge. (Just make sure it's a Yummy day!)

Goosebumps

2007-08-11T21:43:00.000-07:00

What gives me goosebumps? Someone just told me a story the other day that gave me goosebumps, but not the "I'm scared" kind - the "wow that's amazing" kind. Of course, I'm wracking my brain to think of what it was and I'm drawing a blank.

Scary things don't give me goosebumps. I get heart palpitations from those. I remember watching The Grudge while I was nine months pregnant and almost went into labour I was so scared, but nary a goosebump revealed itself.

My husband told me an amazing "goosebumps" story not too long ago from The New Yorker, which I shall paraphrase. An old reel of film was found with a projector by a woman on the curb about ten years ago and she shelved it. The woman who found it happened to be part of a film group and the film was viewed at their next meeting, where they primarily viewed old home movies. It turned out to be someone's wedding movie from the sixties. The only clue in the film as to who the people might be was a poster in the background advertising a boxing match. The movie was also beautifully shot and not your average home movie. One of the men at the screening started doing some research with this one clue. He turned up information about the boxers on the poster and realized one of them was the groom. More research turned up a phone number. He called, and amazingly got the boxer's wife. She thought it must be a prank because he was calling her on their forty-fifth wedding anniversary! Apparently there was only one copy of the film, recorded by none other than Norman Mailer. The wife had taken the film in for restoration and had never seen it again.

Now THAT gave me goosebumps.

Without A Map

2007-08-06T07:40:00.000-07:00

I had the extraordinary pleasure of engaging in a live podcast (via telephone) last night with several other ladies for an interview of the author who wrote "Without a Map". Her name is Meredith Hall. I joined a virtual book club recently and received the (free) book and the only requirement was that I participate in a discussion with the author. Each reader had to think of one to three questions to ask the writer and we each got our turn to ask. The discussion was facilitated by Felicia Sullivan through Writers Revealed, which I was turned on to by Mother-Talk, and it went really well, especially since it was the inaugural podcast for the book club.

The book is a true story about Meredith's struggle to overcome having to give up a child at the ripe old age of 16. It's 1965 and she becomes pregnant. Immediately, she is expelled from school, shunned by the community and shipped off to live with her father and his new wife. The child is taken from her, without her ever seeing him, and thus begins a painful journey of attempts to reconcile this trauma in her life. I don't want to give much more away as I think you should buy the book and read it, but I will tell you that it has a reasonably happy ending.

There weren't many chapters in this book where I didn't have tears in my eyes or actual crying jags. The pain in this story is raw and reading it as a mother was difficult. It was very well written and had me absorbed the entire way through. Go buy it.

I will be participating in another podcast in, I think, September, for another book called Black & White, by Dani Shapiro.

In an aside, hubby and I watched Zodiac (in two parts because it is loooong)(and yes, I'm way behind on movies) and it freaked me out. At least the first half did. That always happens to me. I can watch the most gorey hack and slash movies without batting an eyelash, because if it doesn't seem real, it won't bother me. However, when I KNOW that everything in the movie is real and actually happened, I get super skittish and can have nightmares. Weird.

Funnier

2007-08-05T09:23:00.000-07:00

My mom reminded me of another of my grandmother's favourite jokes:

What did the brassiere say to the hat?

"You go on a head, while I give these two a lift"!

Heeheeeee!

A Funny

2007-08-01T13:26:00.000-07:00

Okay, for some unknown reason, this just popped into my head today. It is a joke my grandmother told me when I was quite young and I was both delighted and horrified when she told it to me. Delighted because it was "naughty" and horrified because she was always so proper and it just wasn't her style. Ready?

What did the stomach say to the burp?

"If you're quiet, I'll let you out the back door"

!!!

Knee-slapper, eh? That Granny!

Fact:

2007-07-30T20:03:00.000-07:00

*The month that the sanitation workers in your city decide to hold a strike, is the very month you decide to clean out the garage to make room for a future gym and therefore you have piles more garbage to dispose of. And recycling. Oh, and it has to be Pride Weekend when there are a GAZILLION more people in the city to add MORE garbage to the overflowing bins.

*The one week that you don't enrol your four year old into daycamp to "give her a break", is the very week your two year old will decide to finally cut those last two molars and become a psychotic shrieking mess with a perfect antagonist on standby to stir him up the moment he calms down. Also during that week will above strike disrupt ANYTHING in the form of entertainment for the children, ie. community centres, public pools and libraries because all of the city is striking in support.

*The day your teenager arrives home from being away for an entire month she will immediately make plans to NEVER be around the parental units and avoid them at ALL COST.

*When you cancel a couple of important appointments to make way for another "slightly more important one", it will get cancelled and you're no further ahead than you were the day before with anything.

Catch me at the end of this week...I might be on heavy meds, but at least I'll be happy and stress-free! tee hee!

Potter Schmotter

2007-07-21T08:43:00.000-07:00

I can't believe the furore. So sick of hearing about it. Who risks a stampede and harm to their person for the sake of a book that will be sitting on the shelves for the next gajillion years by the end of today? What's going to happen if you start reading it one day later than everybody else? Guess I just don't really care since I've only read the first book. I've seen the movies though, so I have a general idea of what's going on. Maybe I'll wait until it's in paperback. I mean, $45 for a kids book? Robbery.

Sorry HP fans - commence the tomato-throwing now.....

P.S. My friend is writing a book about alchemy that is WAY better! I hope she gets it published soon!

Is There Such a Thing as a Foot Reduction?

2007-07-20T13:46:00.001-07:00

Okay - there is something wrong with me. My feet are too big. As sizes go, they're still within the "mainstream" sizing as a hefty 10, but that does not mean they have not been the bane of my existence since they reached that size.

I was into a ladies shoe size by age 9, which at that time I thought was cool. By the time I was a teenager and into a 10, it was depressing. Shoe shopping has always been cause for hyperventilating on my part. There has definitely been a lot of "settling" in my world when it came to shoes. The introduction of stores like Payless Shoe Source alleviated some of the stress as they carry shoes up to size 12, but still - they are not exactly quality shoes. I have rarely owned a comfortable pair of shoes and when I have - I've worn them to their untimely graves. I have literally had to force myself to throw footwear out even though it was "talking".

Anyway - the big feet. Here is my rant for the day. Can I please stop doing this?

This is a case of toe meets corner of wall with baseboard. Here's one from about two months ago that was toe meets IKEA box in the dark:

And remember this?

If there was a way to shorten my feet, I'd so be there. Ow.

Blergh.

2007-07-19T12:17:00.001-07:00

Still feeling kinda icky today - but my son has been reading me stories. Nothing cuter than when he finishes and says "end end" before closing the book. His current favourite movie is Hoodwinked and I don't understand why except that maybe it's because there is action in every scene. At any rate we watch it up to three times a day here. I can recite it by memory now!

Sigh. I gotta get a life.

Hooo!

2007-07-16T09:47:00.000-07:00

Wow - I started this a few days ago and all I got was the title! This'll indicate how grand things have been going lately!

Revelstoke was fun and we stayed at the Canyon Springs Resort where they have "hot springs". That is to say, they pipe the water into a pool from supposed hot springs and then have to reheat it because by the time it makes the journey, it is no longer all that hot. But no matter, the kids LOVED the water and we spent quite a bit of time in it. This required me to suck it up and wear a long t-shirt over my bathing suit to try and hide all of the flaws. I hate the summer.

We bailed a day early. By the fourth day we just decided we'd had enough of "roughing it". We were staying in a cabin that was basically bunks on either side of it with a sink that ran only cold water and a tiny closet that contained a toilet. It was cosy and when the kids went to bed, hubby and I were left outside to battle the mosquitoes. There weren't as many of them as I expected, and we had plenty of repellant but were still bitten nonetheless.

We left around dinner time the night before we were to check out and our son sang "ABCDABC" for about four straight hours until I was wishing I had either a stun gun or a dart gun to make him stop.

The week went by fairly quickly. Daughter One returned from Montreal on her 16th birthday (old enough to drive now, gulp!) and I am having heart palpitations of disbelief that she and I are that old. Thursday I went into my old office to help out as they are having somewhat of a staffing crisis right now. After two years of being away, I was surprised at how much I actually did remember, but other stuff came slowly. I'm not sure how much help I actually was. The ventilation system in the office immediately made me sick and here I am today, still trying to get over it. Bummer.

So there it stands. I'm sorry there is not more Hamster Boy news, but my poor brain is just trying to cope. That's it for now!

Kootenay Impressions

2007-07-08T16:15:00.000-07:00

As you head further northeast in the province, you begin to notice the flame-coloured trees that are being ravaged by the Mountain Pine Beetle, glowing in the sun amidst their green neighbours. The odd birch tree stands out, gleaming green and white - victors cheekily displaying their healthy foliage. No nasty beetles on them!

All the other trees perch on the hillsides, muted in their summer splendor, mourning the loss of their compatriots.

The sun dances under the glacial glares of the mountains, as they dare it to melt their icecaps. The sun obliges enough to send forth waterfalls washing down the mountainsides, some trickling, some gushing.

Moving deeper into the Kootenays, you begin to notice a different summons of death amid the trees. They stand stalwart, like great wizened old men. Their branches jut out of their decaying trunks at odd angles, giving the appearance of many crooked arms. Darkened foliage hangs as ashen grey beards. They are dead, but they remain standing. Same song, different lyrics you might say.

...

Okay, our trip was nowhere this bleak, but it was interesting to see the variety of afflicted trees. Not sure what caused the ones to die right in their tracks, but there they were, waiting for the other shoe to drop as it were. Or the axe to fall.

More about the trip another time. Tired.

Distress

2007-07-03T06:31:00.000-07:00

So basically the big bad allergy monster (uh-oh, here she goes again) has laid me flat. I wake up in the morning feeling, congested with a runny nose (how is that possible?), shakey, sickly and dying. I've tried several medicines with little result. I'm ready to cut my head off.

But enough about me. Hamster Boy got his first official haircut on the weekend. I'm so sad about his curls (I saved some), but it was time - it REALLY was time. Poor guy couldn't see!

Before:

After:

Oh My The Time Does Fly!

2007-06-27T20:34:00.000-07:00

Well, here I am a week later from my last post and I really don't have all that much to report.

Allergies? Check.
Bothersome children? Check, check and check!
Husband still around? Check.
Still love the house? Check!
Keeping busy? CHECK!

I am working on a few different things still and just trying to stay sane now that preschool is finished and there is a week between when Kes starts summer daycamp. We are going away "camping" next week, so that should be fun/torture. But,we'll see.

I had the opportunity to connect with a family who has a baby with bilateral clubfoot. I spoke to the mom about how great Dr. Pirani is and she and her husband came down yesterday with the baby (SO CUTE!) to meet him (they live in the interior of BC) and get casts put on. This baby's story is another nightmare tale of woe much the same as ours was way back when. I decided to meet the family out at the hospital to help them feel at ease and even though I didn't get to visit them for much because Dr. Pirani was running pretty much on time and they had a six hour drive back home, they were a lovely couple and I am 100% confident that Dr. P. can help them. It was a good feeling.

News in the Hamster Boy world is good. He's developing more language every day and it is so cute to hear him speak in tones of voice that Kes uses. He can now recognize and pronounce (pretty much) NINETEEN letters of the alphabet which is impressing the heck out of me! I don't anticipate that he will read any sooner than the norm, but it's exciting for me, an avid reader, to see this level of enthusiasm on his part. I am going to try and get video of him going through his alphabet cards. Oh, and by way of a test, I have gone through the cards forwards, backwards and mixed up because I thought maybe he had them memorized in order. Nope.

We like to play a little game called "Can I Have a Kiss?" I will request a kiss from Hayden and with a devilish grin he will deny me the kiss until I say please, please, please? and pretend to cry. He will then acquiesce and give me the kiss. I used to repeat the same with a request for a hug, until one day I paused for moment and he said to me "Say I want hug". Repeat game. But recently after he has given me the kiss, I have been telling him to ask me for a hug and I deny him. Seeing him pretend to cry is priceless! I can get lots of mileage out of this game!

(Thanks to Laura for the photo)

TWO!

2007-06-19T09:08:00.000-07:00

Today the fabulous Hamster Boy is two years old! I can hardly believe it! I want to grab him and curl up in a corner with him and pretend he is a newborn all over again!

This morning he was in bed with us (he's like clockwork on the 6:30am wake up call right now, kill me) and was singing the word "doobie" to the tune of the alphabet (or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, your choice) and half way through he stops and says "Mom, I song doobie!" Where are these sentences coming from all of a sudden? Mind you, most of it can still be gibberish and I tend to be the only one in the family who can actually "translate", but still - he's talking and running around like a little boy should. Daddy bought him a Radio Flyer bike...shhh...don't tell him!

Two years agao he was born on Father's Day and four days before my birthday. I can't think of a better Father's Day gift or a better birthday gift than this little boy. He has given me so much and my entire world and indeed perspective has changed because of him. Had you asked me the week before he was born, what I thought the future held, I first would have said "I want this kid out IMMEDIATELY!" ('cuz he was due on the 12th!) and maybe that everything would be regular, the same - just doing what I'm doing, only with more kids. Pshht - how little did I know that this little monkey would take me places I'd never imagined. That my knowledge on certain things would expand immensely (did I ever think feet would be interesting? NOPE. I thought feet were the ugliest part of the human body!) and I'd want to know all there is to know. That I'd get connected to some pretty fabulous people, both in person and online.

I'd tried my hand at blogging while pregnant and didn't really care for it. It seemed like a chore, but then so did the pregnancy really. As soon as Hayden was born, I was inspired to document his treatment and then the words just flowed! I ashamedly admit that my girls' lives are nowhere near as documented, but the memories come easy and I may just write it all down one day. Or do a blurb book for each of them. (I did one recently and it came out GREAT!)

In short, because I could wax poetic all day long, having a son has, so far, been the most enriching and rewarding experience of my life and I have this feeling it is only going to get better!

My little hippie!

Projects, Projects

2007-06-16T08:50:00.001-07:00

As if I don't have enough of them, I have started a small sewing project (I should be doing my LARGE sewing projects, but well, you know...). Inspired by a suggestion from my mother and totally flummoxed by how I am going to get my daughter (never mind my son) off of her "uggies" (soothers), I am attempting to design a satin soothie for her. See, one of the things preventing me from weaning her off of them is that she has this whole ritual set up that doesn't involve just sucking on one of them. There's the two that she rubs on her nose. But how do you take away the one for her mouth and leave her with two that could potentially go into her mouth? It won't work. And forgive me for being so lazy to not want to try and set up a completely different set of comfort tools for her. While pondering this with my mother one day, she suggested perhaps a blanket with a satin edge (this has been a family favourite for years), which then sparked the notion of making a satin pacifier that she could still hold and rub on her nose in the same manner, but might be kind of yucky if put in the mouth. Anyway, my first trial has failed abysmally and I may have to consult with Mom for some input. I'll keep you posted on that one. Oh, and I found this picture of Kes when she was small with all of her "uggies", just so you get an idea of how much of a problem this is:

My kids are addicted to what they call "hot dogs", which are in fact "Hot Rods" - those little pepperoni sticks that you can buy at the corner store. Yes, they're salty and fatty and probably loaded with nitrates, but sometimes they are the lesser of the two evils when they are constantly ragging on me for sugar treats. This morning Kes got each of them a "hot dog" and Hayden wolfed his down in a matter of minutes. He returned, informing me that it was "picey", but that he wanted "more more hot dog". This is how he makes a request for everything right now; "more more milk", "more more rice", "more more chapchup" (ketchup) and it is in this sing-songy voice that makes him sound like some sort of talking elevator or something. I asked if he wanted milk and he said yes, so as I got that for him, he helped himself to another "hot dog" from the cupboard. he then came over to me and said "Aha! Hot dog!" I got a giggle out of that one! Oh, and when I kissed him on the cheek later, he rubbed it off and said "dose", which means "gross". Nice.

That's about it for now - still dying from allergies and feeling particularly disgusting and under the weather today, but have to "stiff upper lip" it because there is a street festival today nearby and we have promised Kes we will go with the neighbours to ite. Wish me your best!

Sniffle Snort Wheeze

2007-06-12T08:57:00.000-07:00

Day Three of raging allergies and no sign of them letting up. In fact they are laughing at my various attempts to squelch them with assorted drugs.

Sunday I woke up with such itchy eyes they were sore from me rubbing them within minutes. Hubby had recently purchased some Aerius antihistamine, but it did diddly-squat for me, so I cracked into the Benadryl (forgetting that I usually take them at night) and popped two of them as per the recommended dosage for an adult. Fast forward twenty minutes and I felt like someone had slipped me a Rufi. I was so stoned on them I could hardly function. In fact, here is my son trying to comfort me:

Or rather I made a convenient bed for him to lie on. Anyhoo - hubby went out shopping a little later and picked up my old faithful Claritin, which has worked much better and doesn't make me feel like a teenager after a rock concert. Still kinda itchy tho'.

Other than that, nothing really new to report here. Kids are already driving me crazy (only three and a half weeks until all day summer camp commences for the girl, suh-weet!) and I am up to my eyeballs in projects! Really, had you asked me in January, heck June, of 2005 what I thought I would be doing with myself only two short years later, I never would have said I'd be helping a pretty great orthopaedic surgeon with some really worthwhile and valuable projects. It feels so great to have a purpose (outside of raising decent humans, of course - ain't no more worthy cause than that!)

Now I have to go and check the pollen count to see what delights are in store for me tomorrow! Wheee!

Bits and Pieces

2007-06-09T08:11:00.000-07:00

Well, where to start? Okay, first of all the dental experience went just fine. At least it went reasonably how I expected it to, other than the waiting half an hour past our scheduled visit time - but like I've said, the place is where kids want to be! Video games, toys, puzzles and books, t.v.s with headphones, a dressup corner....which when I went to check on Kes at one point, she had disrobed to her skivvies and was putting on one of the princess outfits. I had to explain to her that the clothing was designed to go over top of what she was wearing! Hayden wandered after big boys, saying "hi!"

Once in, the hygienist asked Hayden if he wanted to "get his picture taken" (x-rays) and he immediately errupted in a screaming "NOOOOOOO!" Even with him on my knee and trying to soothe him, he was hysterical within minutes so we abandoned the idea. I kind of thought they were dreaming and wondered why they wanted to do it when two months ago they told me they didn't do them on kids that young? Weird. He and I got escorted to the "quiet room" so other kids did not get upset listening to my son flip out. We got through the exam quite quickly - it was just a follow up and I didn't learn anything new, just that the teeth are "retruding" and they look fine. I'm wondering if it was just another time they could ding my dental plan $42.00 for a 3 minute look. In the meantime, the other hygienist had asked if she could get started on Kes, who seemed willing, so I just had to let her. With nary the bat of an eye, she sat through x-rays, a check by the hygienist, a polishing, flouride, scaling and a check by the dentist - who pretty much told me the obvious (but nicely), that the "uggies" have to go. All in all, a good visit.

Since then, nothing super new has happened. Preschool has gotten a little chaotic for the next couple of weeks as our sweet teacher lost her beloved husband suddenly to death. We have no details about what happened and the kids have been told nothing other than she won't be back before they are done. They've had to combine the two classes and the kids are really confused and upset. We're thinking about pulling Kes early and trying to contact the teacher later once the dust settles. Very sad, though, as the rumours are it was an accident.

Kes had Kindergarten orientation yesterday at her new school, which went fab. Everyone met in the library and after a brief introduction by the principal, the kids were led away by the two K teachers and then we got to hear a bit more from the principal (who is wonderful and really cares), the PAC leader, the librarian, the community health nurse, a rep from VPL (Vancouver Public Library) and one of the teachers who had returned to say a few words. Their focus at this school is early literacy so they encourage to read at all turns, which I think is terrific. I have always been a voracious reader and even though I hold no degrees, I feel that I have a wide knowledge base due to the fact that I read a lot and often. Plus I think my vocabulary is pretty good, too!

This morning Hayden counted to twelve completely on his own! I was very surprised and pleased! Some other things he's been doing include volunteering "sorry" in the right context, being a jokester (he will truly be the class clown) and singing more songs from memory.

That's about it for now!

Gulp!

2007-06-04T07:33:00.000-07:00

Today is a big day - gulp - I get to take the two littles to the dentist! Kes will be having a cleaning for the first time and Hayden will be getting checked over to see if the teeth he smashed are ok. They've almost shifted back in place, so I think they'll be fine. I am bracing myself for the soother lecture for the bajillionth time and am planning my witty comeback. I love it when health professionals browbeat you about stuff - NOT. So, I will try and fill you all in about how it goes. The best part is that the dentist's office that I am taking them to is like Playland. There is video games, a dress-up corner, a mirror tunnel, televisions, books, toys - situated everywhere in the entire office. Plus they have the GIANT baskets of prizes for the kids to choose from. Hopefully all will be ok.

Wish me luck!

Has It Already Been That Long?

2007-05-31T20:22:00.000-07:00

Okay, this is ridiculous! Every time I log onto Blogger to post, I think "has it really been that long since I last posted?" I'm really sorry! My life escapes on me often. Or I drink too much maybe. (Or maybe not enough) Hmm.

This week has seemed a little screwy to me and I am not sure why. I think now that the cottonwood is in full force my allergies are finally coming out of their cave to wreak havoc. I was expecting them two months ago, but they ignored all of my invitations. I got hit - WHAMMO - today. Itchy eyes (like scratch them out of your face itchy), itchy roof of mouth - gotta love that one, itchy ears, sneezing, wheezing and general irritability, which then becomes worse because I have to take Ventolin or Advair and I get all jittery. Blech. Plus something I ate or drank last night DONE ME WRONG. My digestive track has been on the rampage since last night and no amount of pleading on my part has made it subside. Ah well - it's gotta stop sometime, eh?

We have a new family member. What, you didn't know I was pregnant again?........................

PSYCHE!! No, no - not going down THAT road again! We got a little dwarf hamster and he has been named "Nibbley" by the four year old. He is KEEEE-YEWT! So far, though, Kes is unimpressed by the amount he sleeps. Seems pretty boring to her, except when we put him in the running ball of course - that was fodder for much hilarity! Once I can get a picture of him, I'll post it. You won't be disappointed I assure you.

Okay, so for the next year I am going to bore you with endless talk about Uganda. Like any dutiful traveller I have been doing my homework and research and I am not being disappointed. I bought a Swahili phrasebook and it is the coolest language! Technically English is the official language there, but Swahili is the lingua franca (the common language that everyone speaks). I'm getting a kick out of the phrasebook because there isn't a topic it misses. I also bought this book and am enjoying it immensely - very informative.

I spent much of yesterday torturing myself by looking up Ugandan orphans and came across this, which of course made me cry because I am the mom at every kiddie performance with the Kleenex to her face. I am such a suck. This was no exception, but I did get a kick out of the lyrics. Those crazy Africans - they just call it how they see it! Here in the western world, we'd be thinking of some obscure way to say "don't kill yourself" and also I am not sure if we would call the devil a "loser", but I love the way it sounds. Of course, now I want to adopt ALL of the kids in the video. And I ask, is it fair to make orphans sing a song titled "Oh Mama, Oh Baba", which when translated means "Oh Mother, Oh Father"? That just ain't right! I'm going to be singing that song for days - it's too catchy!

Anyhoo - best go for now. You people have got to yell at me when I don't post often enough - ok?

Gettin' There!

2007-05-20T19:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, so three weeks in the new place and I still have some boxes to unpack, not to mention the entire garage full of stuff that was all boxes of things in our old basement (that sat there for 6 years untouched), but I am beginning to feel like I'm almost there. I have been trying to channel my twin sister, who would have had all of this done in two days, but it's not working out so well. Naturally there are the considerations of newer household furnishings (new couch) to purchase as well as accessories (flat screen t.v.s), but all in good time. By way of an aside, the UGLY couch and loveseat that have been featured in many of the photos I have posted are GONE!! I am jubilant! Know why? They were a WEDDING gift from my SECOND husband's parents in 1994. All I can say is "ding dong the witch is dead". Every time I looked at those things they represented something less than savoury to me. The local chapter of the SPCA was more than happy to take them off our hands to resell to someone who will love them again.

Oh, and my office/slash sewing room has become a reality! Can I hear a "what-what"? Or better yet, how about a chorus of angels all singing that one perfect note? I've actually already made a baby blanket and given it as a gift - the ones for sale will come eventually, but for now I feel I must get back into the swing of things.

I have a lot on my plate right now. Household things aside, I've got Hayden's fundraiser coming up and did I mention I agreed to be a coordinator? What on earth was I thinking? I haven't even collected one cent for the walk yet and it's next Sunday. Boy when I choose to be dumb, I go all the way.

I need to unearth all of my fabric and crafting supplies and get them organized. I'm a little terrified of digging out all of the rubber stamps because I have been buying them willy nilly over the past few years and stuffing them anywhere and I really think I've lost track of the ones I've bought and exactly how many of them I have. Gulp! The fabric situation is no better. I notice that most of the plastic bins in the aforementioned garage have "Heather Material" written on the side of them. Oh boy.

I am continuing to work on the Ugandan project for Dr. Pirani. I got stuck on one piece that was much longer than the others and much harder to decipher (these are notes that were transcribed from tape and I am rewriting them and putting them into more of a "professional" format). It was also a very gut-wrenching piece for me to read as it got into more detail of the poverty situation over there and what people have to go through to survive, never mind getting treatment for their clubfoot kid. No wonder the rate of correction is only 60% as opposed to over 95% here. I now have a new mission that coincides with my desire to pay a visit over there. I have an appointment set up to talk to Dr. Pirani for early June and will fill you in when the time comes. Let's just say I am feeling very passionate about it.

I've been trying to write for myself as well. Not sure if I mentioned the children's story I have written, but I also have a piece of adult fiction that I've started and am not getting very far with. The time! Oh the time!

Here's the thing: having my "own space" to set up does not necessaily mean that I get the precious minutes to do it in. How about that? Huh!

The days seem to go by in one foggy haze for me right now. The kids being together in the same room has generally worked out - Kes will just roll over and ignore Hayden if he's bothering. But I notice that Hayden's nap is starting to play a key role in how well he settles down. If he gets to sleep later than around 1:30, then he's awake for much longer (like right now I can hear him thrashing his brace against the crib right above me - turkey). This, of course does not mean that he won't still wake up at SIX-FREAKIN'-FIFTEEN in the morning, like he's been doing for the past couple of weeks. I feel like the walking dead right now. Or like I have suddenly acquired ADD (not too unlikely as it is already in the family) and concentrate on one thing at a time. Ay me.

On Kes: the bribery technique for the toileting issue has worked WONDERS! It worked almost from the get-go and I have let a couple of little near incidents go. I wasn't going to today, but she was so devastated that she wasn't going to be able to put a sticker on the calendar that I made a deal with her and it all worked out. I have to say that as bad as people think bribery is, it WORKS. Plus as a friend's husband put it: "I wouldn't go to work if they didn't pay me" - so technically the world is made up of bribery, ain't it? HA!

On Hayden: his language skills are still reasonably immature, but progressing. I can understand most of his gibberish and now and again he comes out with expressions such as "Oh, NO WAY!" and "Oh God!" that sound hilarious. I find that even though his speech is less advanced than his sisters' was, he is much more mature in many other ways. For example, this morning I sat him on a big chair at the kitchen table so he could eat a fruit cup. We got rid of the high chair before we moved and bought a little inflatable booster seat, but I bypassed it today. He calmly sat and ate his fruit, stopping to sip the juice out of the cup when he noticed it was dripping off his spoon onto the table. Had I ever tried that with Kes at this age, she would have been off the chair and running around splashing fruit juice all over the house.

Recently I bought a CD for Hayden at his sing-a-long group by this woman (who runs the group) and both of the kids love it**. It's a CD of fun songs for kids that aren't necessarily all kiddie songs. I think some of them might be old pub songs actually! When "The Cat Came Back" starts to play you can hear Hayden singing "back", "day", "away" and it is just so darned cute. I really need to get him into music as early as possible. He just loves singing. He also sings along to his Learn to Dress Elmo doll, which I love!

Well, that's about all for now folks. Bye for now!

** My favorite song on the CD is "Paddy McGinty's Goat" - way too funny:

Mister Patrick McGinty, an Irishman of note,
Came into a fortune, so bought himself a goat.
Said he, "Sure, of goat's milk I mean to have my fill!"
But when he got his Nanny home, he found it was a Bill.

And now all the ladies who live in Killaloo
Are all wearing bustles like their mothers used to do.
They each wear a bolster beneath the petticoat,
And leave the rest to Providence and Paddy McGinty's goat!

Missis Burke to her daughter said, "Listen, Mary Jane,
Now who was the man you were cuddling in the lane?
He'd long wiry whiskers all hanging from his chin."
"Twas only Pat McGinty's goat, " she answer'd with a grin.

Then she went away from the village in disgrace,
She came back with powder and paint upon her face.
She'd rings on her fingers, and she wore a sable coat,
You bet your life they never came from Paddy McGinty's goat.

Little Norah McCarthy the knot was going to tie,
She washed all her trousseau and hung it out to dry.
Then up came the goat and he saw the bits of white.
He chewed up all her falderals, and on her wedding night

"Oh turn out the gas quick!" she shouted out to Pat,
For though l'm your bride, sure l'm not worth looking at.
I'd got two of ev'rything, I told you when I wrote,
But now I've one of nothing, all thro' Paddy McGinty's goat.

Mickey Riley he went to the races t'other day.
He won twenty dollars and shouted, "Hip Hooray!!"
He held up the note, shouting "Look what I've got!"
The goat came up and grabbed at it and swallowed all the lot.

"He's eaten my banknote," said Mickey, with the hump.
They ran for the doctor, he brought a stomach pump.
He pumped and he pumped for that twenty dollar note,
But all he got was ninepence out of Paddy McGinty's goat.

Now old Paddy's Goat had a wonderous appetite,
and one day for breakfast he ate some dynamite.
A whole box of matches he swallowed all serene
and then he went and gobbled up a quart of paraffin.

He sat by the fireside, he didn't give a hang,
He swallowed a spark and exploded with a bang.
So if you go to heaven you can bet a dollar note....
that the Angel with the whiskers on is Paddy McGinty's Goat.

P.S. I got my hair cut on Friday. Nothing really to report. Just happy to have it cut is all.

Happy Mother's Day?

2007-05-13T19:43:00.000-07:00

Today, on what is supposed to be a day celebrating mothers, I want to quit. I resign from being a mother. Maybe I will reconsider tomorrow, but it really depends on how much sleep I get.

The kids have driven me absolutely bat-sh*t crazy today. Hayden is cutting his two year molars - one. at. a. time. Can we just say "painful" and not just for him. I'm not sure what is happening with Kes, but her behaviour has gotten increasingly worse. She is combative, contrary and contradictory. She would literally argue that the sky is black right now. Every little thing that comes out of my mouth is met with a "no, (insert long explanation of why "no" here)". To top it all off, she has been wetting her pants continually, much to our frustration. I have tried to be really nice about it and not get upset. So far the "understanding approach" has not worked. Getting angry doesn't work either. I'm going to have to pull out the big guns and revert back to the bribery method. We aren't sure if this is just a by-product of the move and all the changes that have been going on around here, but whatever it is, we're darned sick of it and it has to stop. This is my second bout of nightmarish toilet training and I can just hardly WAIT for Hayden to start. Oh boy.

Blergh. Ahhh...anyway.....

The new house is fab and we are slowly emptying out boxes and revealing more space as time goes by. I am finding though that just trying to keep on top of the daily stuff, PLUS unpack - kind of sucks the life out of me. You know once you've unpacked all of the necessities that you really lose the drive to carry on. But I will prevail! The new neighbours seem excellent so far and have made us feel very welcome to the area. We had one amazingly delicious dinner out this weekend at a Filipino restaurant called Rekados that was so good I think I might be dreaming about it for weeks to come!

Well, gotta go and check out my new MP3 player that hubby bought for me today!

Brief Update

2007-05-05T19:24:00.000-07:00

Wow, is it really that long since I posted? Shame on me! Okay, well at least I have moving to blame it all on.

We have safely landed in the new home and the move went really well! Three guys came the day before the actual move and packed up the entire house in a day! One guy spent the entire eight hours in the kitchen and I thought if it took him that long that it would have taken me six months! However, once unpacking on the other side it became evident why it took him so long (and why there were so many boxes, too!) - he'd wrapped every little plastic lid and cup and whatnot as well as all of the glass. Well, you can't blame a guy for being thorough!

Anyway, after some minor phone and cable issues (there were no wires connecting them from the pole to the house and neither Telus or Shaw Cable would believe us that they weren't working!!) we are up and running for the most part. One minor renovation is being waited on (joining the main house to the suite for the extra bedroom), so there are a lot of things that cannot be unpacked yet, but hopefully Monday will be "the day"! We also need to get shower doors installed on both of the tubs since we do not want to bother with the whole shower curtain thing (there isn't even a rod on either tub anyway). When I return, I'll fill you in on some of the great features of the home...stuff we didn't even know was here! Sweet!

Loving the new neighbourhood and it's hard to believe that I was so angry about moving back in December! Ah well, it's all about time with me!

Be well everyone!

Egg On My Face

2007-04-17T16:33:00.000-07:00

Hayden continued to limp over the weekend, never seeming in terrible pain, but definitely noticing something in his foot and kind of just working with it. So on Monday I decided to call his orthopaedic surgeon and get him checked out. One of the things I like so much about Dr. Pirani is that he is a man of action and is just so caring. He told me to come in right away and he'd have a look. I was relieved that I didn't have to go in today during the cast clinic because I'd had this feeling it might be mayhem since he's just been away.

Drove out to his office, relatively easy drive - light traffic. Got there and he had a look. Within moments of looking at the right foot, he turns to me and says "I think he might have a sliver in his foot". Oh. My. Lord. I look and sure enough there is a little red spot with a festering centre and when he touched it, Hayden recoiled. Um - DOY!

Now to be fair to myself, it must have festered overnight because I SWEAR I would have noticed that! And when hubby and I investigated it further that night, we decided it must be a shard of glass or something transparent, because we could not find a wood sliver at all. I think it is still in his foot, but if we don't get it out, eventually his body will work it out on its own. I felt relieved and dumb at the same time! Dr. Pirani just said he was glad that it wasn't anything serious.

I DID get to talk to him about reducing the degrees of abduction on his brace and he agreed, so I have, and hopefully it will stop some of the tripping and catching of the foot on doorways, etc.

Poor little monkey, though. Slivers hurt like the dickens, especially in your feet!

So that crisis is over. On to the next......!!

P.S. It now makes sense to me why the physiotherapist mentioned he was favouring his right foot - must have just gotten the sliver or it was just starting to hurt! Sheesh!

My Secret Identity

2007-04-14T21:35:00.000-07:00

I wish my secret identity could be "Super Mom", but alas this is not to be so. So many days I wish I could just balance it all and keep it together. I wake up each morning thinking maybe this will be the day that the house is magically clean (from my super powers, of course!), that Kestrel won't oppose me at every turn, Hannah will walk out of the door in jeans and a t-shirt and not some strange concoction that she thinks looks nice and Hayden will not stalk me to the bathroom. Oh, and maybe hubby will bring me flowers for being such a super mom! But in the meantime, I have to settle for being "mediocre mom". The one who waits for hubby to get home and cook dinner because it is just way too overwhelming to think about doing while keeping two small people entertained. The one who rather than automatically picking up that 25 piece foam puzzle, steps over it for the one millionth time. The one who thinks that "today is not a makeup day" for the twentieth day in a row. And the one who wishes she could drop that extra 20 or 30 pounds by osmosis without having to put out any effort.

Anyhoo...

Hamster Boy is limping on his right foot/leg and hubby and I are quite perplexed about it. It started yesterday when we picked him up from daycare and the mom there told us he was complaining about his right shoe. I put it on him without fuss and carried him to the car. Once inside the house, we set him down and right away he started going "whoa! whoa! whoa!" and limping badly. I checked him all over for any sign of fracture, bruising, cuts, marks of any kind and there is nothing. I grilled Kestrel about anything that might have happened at daycare and that all checked out. If there in anyone more honest than Kes, I'd be surprised. She's the Tattle Queen.

Since he wasn't really crying about it, we did not assume it was a break or even a sprain. He just kept saying "whoa!" and limping around. We decided to give him Motrin and let him rest it and see what happened.

This morning he started to say "whoa" when I put him on his feet, but he seemed otherwise fine. Hubby and discussed the possibility of a shin splint or maybe plantar faciitis. These are two things that don't necessarily hurt when you touch them, but hurt like the dickens once you put weight on them. And there was no end of poking and prodding on my part, with no results. Oh, if he only had more language!

Anyway, it appeared that shoes made it more difficult for him to walk and I am considering booking an appointment with his ortho to check it out. I have noticed that his right foot is now very over-corrected and seems to trip him up a lot. I am thinking that I need to adjust the abduction (outward rotation) of his brace from 70 degrees to maybe 50 or 60 to alleviate that. but once again, I am in that position of second-guessing myself. He did end up still limping for the day and I got the impression that he is just "putting up with it". Sigh. Poor baby.

Lord, it's just one thing after the next with this kid! Any thoughts I had of an easy ride with the third kid have been dissolved. He is my "bootcamp baby" - unlike my girls and much to my surprise, it is he who is truly training me to be a mother. Maybe not a Super Mom, but darned close.

Hmmmm

2007-04-14T08:35:00.000-07:00

You Are 44% Abnormal

You are at low risk for being a psychopath. It is unlikely that you have no soul.

You are at high risk for having a borderline personality. It is very likely that you are a chaotic mess.

You are at low risk for having a narcissistic personality. It is unlikely that you are in love with your own reflection.

You are at medium risk for having a social phobia. It is somewhat likely that you feel most comfortable in your mom's basement.

You are at medium risk for obsessive compulsive disorder. It is somewhat likely that you are addicted to hand sanitizer.

How Abnormal Are You?

Hey, how is it possible that I am more abnormal than Rabbitch?

Headline

2007-04-07T11:19:00.000-07:00

"Parent Invents Special Rubberized Furniture That Children Bounce Off Of"
Tired and frustrated with the constant accidents her children were having in the family home, a mother has invented a special rubberized furniture that absorbs shocks and children actually bounce off of. "I was so tired of having to watch my kids like a hawk. Somewhere in the day a household has to function and things need to get done. The laundry does not do itself, although I am working on that one!" says Mrs. Mugwort.

Next to come is the rubberized flooring line that is currently in development. You can view the entire collection at www.imjustkiddinya.com

Ah, if only that would happen. Maybe I'll have to be the one to do it!

Hayden had an accident on Monday that I am just now able to blog about. What a stressful week. I cannot tell you exactly what happened as I was not in the room, but Hayden was carrying around a Makita flashlight (one that he has been carting around for months with no accidents) and went from the kitchen, where I was, to the living room. My guess is that he either tried to kneel or climb onto his ride-on car, or just plain tripped (or slipped) and fell, but I think he fell and jammed the flashlight into his mouth, relocating some of his teeth, at least two but maybe three. All I heard was the crash and the screams. When I got to him he was bleeding from his mouth and I figured it was the classic "tooth throught the lip" or the other classic "split the inside of the lip". Upon investigation I saw that there was no cut, but that the blood was coming from around one of his teeth. I got the cold cloth and tried to staunch the flow of blood while consoling him. I seemed to get that under control, only to realize that the top left front tooth did not appear to be where it used to be. Okay, I think, maybe it's just from swelling and it looks like it isn't right. Wishful thinking of course. I made a dentist appointment with my dentist for the next day, but about an hour or so later I noticed the gums were still bleeding and that the tooth next to the first odd-looking one was now appearing to be in the wrong spot.

I called the dentist back to see if they could get us in that day and once there I was told by me dentist that the teeth would have to come out. Not only that, she was indicating that they needed to come out either that day or the next day. Panic. Cold sweats. Nausea. I was then told that we would have to be referred to a paediatric dentist because they did not do extractions on small people. When they called to make an appointment for us, they were informed that we would be referred again to an oral surgeon or we would have the option of going to Children's Hospital to have it looked at. Rather than ping-ponging from dental office to dental office, I decided to confer with hubby and make the decision with him. We were beside ourselves. After all he has been through, we couldn't imagine him having have two missing front teeth for the next four eyars. I mean, just in his first year alone, almost every photograph of him shows casts on both his legs or an orthopaedic brace. Could we not give the kid a break and have some regular photos of him?

We voted on Children's because if there needed to be teeth pulled out, he was going to have to be sedated for it and he might as well be at the hospital. We took Kes over to daycare to avoid making her wait the inevitable three hours. I checked in at Emergency to see where we should go and was greeted by a snippy and seemingly irritated triage nurse who obviously did not understand what I was trying to ask her and she informed me we would not be seeing a dentist, but rather a doctor. Confused, we decided to wait and see what happened, but in the meantime I had not had lunch and was dying for a drink and something to eat, so crossed over to another building where the Starbucks was. I happened to notice that the dental clinic was in that building so I went back to tell hubby that I thought I should just go and inquire what we should do or at least what the procedure was.

hey were lovely to me in the clinic and the dentist there told me she was just finishing some paperwork and would come over to Emerg once she was finished and have a look at him. She did not have to do this as she was not even a resident, but when she checked him out she told us the teeth would not need to be extracted and that they would just go back to where they were if all was well. She wanted to take x-rays but the radiology was closed by then, so she referred us over to another paediatric dentist (the same one my dentist was going to send us to). So two days later I took him there and was again reassured that the teeth could stay in his head. I thought we'd be getting an x-ray but was told they don't do them on little kids because it is too hard. He explained that since the teeth were driven up into the bone and his bones are still soft, that it is the bone and not the teeth that takes the impact and distributes it. The teeth themselves take very little of the hit at all and therefore do not fracture. He said that if there has been damage done to the adult teeth, then it's done and there is nothing they can do about it until the permanent teeth come in, so they would not extract on that basis. He also confirmed that they will go back to where they were. It's still pretty much a wait and see situation. There is still the risk that they could abcess and have to come out, but that could happen a year from now or longer. As far as we are concerned, every day we can keep them the in his head is a good day!

Now, on to that rubber furniture plan......!

Deepest, Darkest

2007-03-31T14:51:00.000-07:00

In the deepest, darkest still of the night, that 'tween where night becomes day again or when the day is upon us but it is not yet light, sometimes I wake up and for an hour I think and think and think. It's hard to say how many different ramblings go through my mind, but I find this ends up being the time of clarity for me. Warm under blankets, listening to the odd sounds coming from the street, I can solve some of my biggest problems, conquer some of my deepest fears, confront my darkest secrets and confirm my deepest loves.

The Power of Advertising

2007-03-28T12:16:00.000-07:00

If you ever wonder who they write all those commercials with catchy songs and funny premises for...it's me. I am their target audience. After seeing the commercials for this and this, I have been fighting the urge to go out and BUY! Lately I find old commercial songs popping into my head at certain times. For example, whenever I make the kids chicken noodle soup now, I sing:

When I want chicken noodle
Mom makes Lipton Chicken Noodle
It's the only chicken noodle
That'll do

'Cuz Lipton chicken noodle
Is delicious chicken noodle
And there's lots of little noodles
That you chew

Thanks Mom for chicken noodle
Thanks for Lipton Chicken Noodle
It's the only chicken noodle
That'll do!

In the original commercial, I vaguely remember a kid in a chicken suit (on stage as though he was in a school play) walking around with his wings flapping, so of course I have to add this to the act. It's most entertaining for my kids.

Then yesterday, after Kes had a wipeout on the concrete, hubby mentioned that she might need some Ozonol on her knee. I then broke into this:

How about a little squeeze?
You've had a little fall
You've scraped your elbow or your knee
That's the time for a little squeeze
Of Ozonol

And just randomly popping into my head came this 1980s Canadian anti-smoking tune. It was rather mournful and to the point:

I never did a thing
That made a smaller person
Lose the way
My freedom won't allow it
My freedom...
Won't allow it

That one is quite obscure and I could not even find it on a Google search. Anyway, it's funny how having kids makes you wax nostalgic and recall the weirdest things from your youth.

We've been hosting a Japanese exchange student this week at our home. We had expected them around 8pm on Saturday and there was a huge mixup with the times and they ended up arriving at 10:30am. We didn't get the call until around 3:00pm as we were out shopping for groceries in preparation. Fortunately we are only five minutes from the school and got there quickly, but these poor kids had been waiting there all day! Some of the host families are in Surrey! I felt so bad for the three or four we left behind. And then they had to be back at the school at 7:45 the next morning for a day trip to Victoria, poor kids! Her name is Mina (meena) and she will be with us until Sunday and although she is relatively quiet and unobtrusive, I am finding one more person in the house to be overwhelming. The great part is that even though we were led to believe that she would have no English, hers is quite good. As good fortune would have it, English is her passion and she works very hard at it. Naturally she came bearing lots of gifts that only come packaged the way the Japanese do it. Everything was gift-wrapped neatly. There was a tin of rice crackers in a variety of flavours, a wooden "catch the ball" toy for the kids, as well as a couple of story books that Mina laboriously translated for us into English (how very sweet!) along with a little setup of the storybook characters in beanbag form (I'll try and snap a photo of that), a jar of cherry blossoms packed in salt that you make into a tea (peculiar, but not bad), and a little box of confections individually wrapped in rice paper - they are shaped like little bells and are like eating a sugar cube - yum!

So now you know why I have been a little quiet these last few days.

Hayden has turned into a mina bird and repeats most things you say to him. He is learning more shapes now, so along with DIE (star) and MOO (moon), he now has KIRKLE (circle) , OVOVO (oval) and GOGOGO (triangle). If I ever need to distract him, as I did this morning while we signed some insurance papers, I pop in A Treasure in My Garden and he stands there enthralled - this is by far the best purchase I have EVER made. The songs are sweet, short and not the kind that drive you batty after hearing them 10,000 times.

The other thing he really likes is Hi5. I ADORE this program! Not only are the songs catchy and short, but the show contains none of the typical preachiness that you find in so many of today's cartoons and kids shows. I mean, I know we have to make kids aware about the environment and social issues early on, but please. We are talking about year and a half old kids. They want colours, they want music, they was flash, they want entertainment. They are not going to understand the nuances of saving the rainforest ditties. Don't they get enough of that forcefed to them in school anyway? How many times has my teenaged daughter had to go out and pick up other people's garbage, cigarette butts and dirty diapers in the community? More times than I like to count. And don't we have city services (and pay taxes) for that stuff?

Okay, somewhere along the way that turned into an unintentional rant! Sorry about that!

The movers have been booked and are arriving on April 27th to do the packing. I am sick with excitement, mostly because I don't have to do it! Sure, I'll pack a few things so I know where they are, like my makeup. But for the most part, I'll enjoy that present-like atmosphere of opening boxes on the other end, not knowing exactly what is in them!

My Grandmother's Kitchen

2007-03-23T14:43:00.000-07:00

Some of the best memories I have as a child under the age of eight, are in my grandmother's kitchen. It was a relatively big kitchen compared to what you might find in a house today. At least that is my memory of it. There was an alcove for the table and chairs with windows all around it. There were two doors into it from the house, one from the hallway and one from the dining room and another door out to the back yard. To me, that house is still what I have in my mind as a traditional house. My twin sister and I grew up in that house until our mother remarried when we were eight. I have such fond memories of Cathy and I sitting at our little red card table with the fold-out legs and nursery rhyme characters like Jack and Jill on the beige vinyl table top. We had matching red folding chairs to go with it. (I think my mom might still have the table, at least.)

I have vivid memories of my sister sitting woefully in front of a plate bearing brussels sprouts and my grandfather bopping by and surreptitiously grabbing one or two of them and stuffing them in his mouth, while I suppressed a giggle. I always ate my brussels sprouts like a good girl, but then again, I LIKED them (and still do!)

I can still remember which cupboard the treacle was kept in, which we used to eat on Yorkshire Pudding for dessert.

I can remember bursting through the door from the back yard into the kitchen with handfuls of dandelions for my Granny's yellow canary, "Cheepy". He was a sweet little bird and liked to sing to anything electric, such as the vacuum cleaner or blender. The day he died Granny picked us up from school which was a rare treat and then broke the news on the way home. I recall her carefully taking him out of a paper bag to show us his little body. The kitchen was not quite the same after that, without him singing joyfully from his cage.

I can remember peering out the kitchen window when Granny would say "there's Grandad's plane going over, wave to him!" when Grandad would go on business trips. He was (and still is at the age of 90) an interior decorator.

We would ask Granny how old she was and she'd say "one hundred and seven", and the light shining through the kitchen windows would glint in her eyes.

I DO recall one dreadful evening when I was about six and as I was heading out of the kitchen after supper, Granny said "where do you think you're going?" and threw me a dish towel. It was dishes forever after that (on alternate nights, thank goodness for twins!) with careful, nay stern, instructions from her: "don't take the dish I just put in the rack, let it drain!"

That house, and therefore kitchen, is long gone. It was torn down to accommodate something more modern, I'm sure. Based on my personal memory, I used Paintbrush to create a floor plan of the main floor of that old house. It seems so huge in my memory, but I am sure had I visited it again as an adult, it would not have seemed so big.

It's a little tiny, sorry. If you click it, it gets a little bigger.

In my own experience, kitchens tend to be places of congregation. No matter how much seating you have in the rest of your house, company will always gravitate towards the kitchen. It becomes the nucleus of a house. Laughter and happiness abide in the kitchen. My kitchen shall be no exception.

I am very happy that our new house has a family room/kitchen area that is of a good size. I hope that I can build the same kinds of memories for my children and subsequently my granchildren. Maybe I'll even get them to call me "Granny"!

Spring Break Madness

2007-03-21T14:29:00.000-07:00

So. Here we are on day three of Spring Break and I'm already thinking of ways to escape the house without anyone noticing. Pass me the vodka, now.

We are full on into getting quotes to have this house packed up and moved and already the arguing has commenced. So far, Argument No. 1 shall be known as the "Disagreement of Dates". We get possession of the new house on the 27th of April. The buyers of this home take possession at noon on the 30th. In my mind the logical day to move is the 28th, because then there is a whole day for cleaners to come in while the house is empty and go for it. Hubby wants to move on the 29th because he has a whole bunch of filing cabinets to move and wants to do that on the 28th. If we do it his way, we somehow have to get the house clean before noon on April 30th. Stress much? Like, when exactly will we arrange for the cleaners to come? 5:00pm on Sunday night, or 5:00am on Monday morning? And since the filing cabinets are in the basement and I have no intention of cleaning the basement beyond the absolute basics (it's BARE), couldn't the consarned cabinets be moved on the 29th? Pass me the vodka, now.

**UPDATE** This Argument is now moot. The date of moving shall be....April 28th! YESSS! (insert victory dance here).

Okay, boring. How about some Hamster Boy juiciness?

New boots (blurry photo not taken by me)

More new boots

New ballet gear for upcoming class!

Art from found objects by Kestrel

Admiring said art

My Celebrity Look-Alikes

2007-03-18T19:21:00.000-07:00

How cool!

http://www.myheritage.com

What Inspires Me?

2007-03-18T08:55:00.000-07:00

I've decided to participate in Sunday Scribblings to challenge my writing a little bit. Also, it might stop me from complaining so much here!

Inspiration has always played a large role in my life. I have been writing since the tender age of six. My first "published work" was in the school gazette at Shaughnessy Elementary School. The teacher had asked us to write about fire drills and what to do. I had drawn a picture (my artistic skills have not improved since then) of some stick people walking and written the caption "when there's a fire, shut your mouth and close the door". I remember the teacher really liked it and getting my first taste of "being published" had me hooked big time. I've written ever since. I've not had anything formally published, mind you, but we'll get there.

Writing is not the only creative thing I do. Since the age of six, I have also knitted. Over the years, I picked up sewing, cross-stitching, paper-crafting, paper-quilling, rubber-stamping and scrapbooking. I'll try anything crafty if it interests me enough.

I can find inspiration in the smallest things. It can be watching people on the bus, for example. Yesterday I spotted an elderly asian couple on the #20. The husband was lovingly tying a scarf around his wife's neck and adjusting it so it was "just so". He also was not wearing socks inside his running shoes, which caught my eye. I thought it was so sweet that I jotted a note down about it and plan to use that scene in a story sometime.

I love colours that are rich and deep. Pastels are okay and they certainly played a part in my life in the 80s, but give me a deep plum, a rich chocolate brown or an indigo blue any time now. I like to buy yarn and envision what to make with it, rather than getting the pattern first and buying the yarn second. Of course that scenario doesn't always work out if you don't have enough of the yarn!

Going into craft stores can set the creative juices flowing like mad. I've already made my wishes clear in the event of my death. I can spend hours just poring over all the exciting textures, colours and sparkly things!

I wouldn't say that I seek inspiration out exactly, rather it comes to me on its own. The times when I am uninspired are the darkest for me.

Recently, I have received inspiration that is more than creative for me. When Hayden was born with clubfoot, little did I know where that path would lead me. I now have had the opportunity to be involved in two wonderful projects related to clubfoot and the correction of it. I am inspired to make a trip to Uganda to see how one of the projects is helping out there. Another mother and I have discussed the idea of going one day. Working with Dr. Pirani has been rewarding and inspiring in itself.

Of course, my best creations are my three kids. And I am inspired to keep them inspired.

Phew!

2007-02-25T07:46:00.000-08:00

People, there is so much going on right now, I can't even tell you! We've looked at a total of thirteen houses so far, offered on one and got shot down by the utter MORONS who own the house, and are looking to offer on another, hopefully this weekend. I've been wanting to post and fill you in on all the hamster goodness, but most of my time has been spent on MLS right now. Please bear with me and I'll try to get back to the regularly scheduled Hamster Boy as soon as possible! I have some great video clips of him to upload and post!

P.S. Did I really type "journies" in my last post? People...you're supposed to correct me on these faux pas! J-O-U-R-N-E-Y-S. A testimony to how rattled I am right now, I suppose.

Startin' Over

2007-02-13T14:40:00.000-08:00

So the house is definitely sold and the deposit cheque has been applied and so on and so forth. Now commences the panic. We have until the end of April to find a place, buy it and move in. Somebody grab the tranquilizer gun now.

You see, so much of my life has consisted of "starting over" and I'm honestly quite fed up with it. I don't want to have to settle into a new place and "start over". It freakin' SUCKS! The thought of having to organize five people into a new dwelling is just so...daunting...to me. And let's not forget the continual "up and down" process of buying a new house. The effort required to go to each house, dismiss 90% of them, get your hopes up about one, have said hopes dashed as someone offers just that $1,000 more than you, is overwhelming. Anyway, I digress. There's nothing to do but press forward because, um....WE HAVE NO HOUSE!

That being said, there is one open house coming up on the weekend that looks nice (from the outside anyway) and is in an okay area (although I shudder at the thought of dealing with the Commercial Drive entitlement), that's very close to school for Hannah, close-ish to Skytrain (monorail) and is in the catchment area for a different school than I thought, because the school that I thought got baaaaad ratings for the last five years or so. One bonus is that in my elementary school journies I have discovered that there are 37 schools in Vancouver that have all day Kindergarten. I repeat - ALL DAY KINDERGARTEN! Woot! Sign me up, or rather sign Kestrel up! She is sooo ready for this and I can't imagine what having that time might mean to me. Having 2-3 hours in the afternoon while Hayden sleeps? I might actually get something DONE! Like sewing! And paper-crafting! And writing (most importantly of all)!

Saints Preserve Me!

2007-02-08T20:35:00.000-08:00

Okay, I can't even talk about the house thing. I think I'm deep in denial right now.

What I DO want to talk about is the stupid Coastal Health Authority who is, once again, trying to immunize my teenaged daughter, when she is COMPLETELY UP TO DATE on all of them. They sent me a form stating that they had signed consent from me to immunize her and on February 20th, will innoculate her for the following:

Measles, Mumps, Rubella
Polio
Tetanus, Diphtheria, Petussis
Polio

Ummm...she needs the polio TWICE in the same day? Get it together morons! Here is the letter I am attaching to the form:

To whom it may concern;

Please do not immunize my daughter again. You do not have a signed consent from me allowing you to immunize her. She is completely up to date on all of her vaccinations, save the hepatitis B, which I have refused (a few times). Part of her shots were done by Fraser Health Authority (under the name Hannah J*hns*n) and the others (with the exception of her Grade Nine shot which was done at the school, so there should be a record) were done by her doctor, Dr. K.J. The school should have a record of her health passport in her file stating that she has all of her vaccinations. My copy of it is buried in our basement somewhere and I have no idea where it might exactly be. This is the second time I have confronted this issue. I have no reason to lie about this. I am not a tree-hugging Commercial Drive parent and take immunizations very seriously, so I would appreciate it if you would just take my word for it.

If this continues to be a problem, I will, very begrudgingly, drag my two small and trialsome children on a bus and the Skytrain out to her doctor’s office in New Westminster, walk up the godawful hill from Sapperton station because there is no ramp there any more, carrying my 25 pound son and propelling my preschool-aged daughter, and obtain what records I can, but you need to know that this will cause me to be in a VERY. BAD. MOOD. And this will then cause every single living organism in my immediate cosmos to suffer. I hope you are willing to take the responsibility for that.

In the meantime, if you could kindly put a note on her records that she is up to date and roll your eyes about her difficult mother and maybe spit on the ground when you speak my name; that would be great.

Yours truly,

I hope they get the message this time. Gits.